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tagallopes

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tagallopes

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Visits<b>zombi3_queen</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Treken</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 8:01am<b>Lct1196</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:42am<b>Vahex</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 2:54pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:14pm<b>Sam_A16_</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:10pm<b>AFaye3964</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 11:17am<b>niennaseragon</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 8:18am<b>ilovemonkeybutts</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 12:37am<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:09pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 5:09am<b>Logan_A_Caruso</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:04pm<b>adamxxx2567</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 2:49pm<b>relaxeazy</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 1:43am<b>Lovemybabies</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 11:32pm<b>Amranih</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 3:58pm<b>thissexyguy96</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 11:48pm<b>R3TROxLOV3</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 5:09pm

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tagallopes's favorite FMLs

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30975) - you deserved it (14278)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35637) - you deserved it (3641)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

Today, while eating cotton candy, a drunk person came up to me and said "HEY! COTTON CANDY!" And bit me. FML

#21249322
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36333) - you deserved it (2694)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML

#21199559
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44458) - you deserved it (7084)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

#21189976
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41031) - you deserved it (4173)

On 06/27/2014 at 2:11am - work - by IAMALITAHA (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52390) - you deserved it (4607)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend's grandma took me to his house to hang out. I then heard her in the kitchen telling his mom how hard she tried to leave me at the nearest gas station. FML

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

#21158688
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46684) - you deserved it (5187)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland

Today, I took my driving test. It was all going well until out of habit from driving with my boyfriend, I reached over and held my instructor's hand. FML

#21154900
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43403) - you deserved it (16192)

On 05/28/2014 at 5:12pm - misc - by chevygirl51 - United States

Today, I got called "un-American" when I said I didn't care about Kim and Kayne's wedding. FML

#21154136
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61703) - you deserved it (5428)

On 05/28/2014 at 12:13am - misc - by Yeppets - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that my daughter was looking for love in all the wrong places, specifically the county jail. FML

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

#21146270
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54093) - you deserved it (4798)

On 05/20/2014 at 1:27pm - misc - by Q - United States

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML



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