About superswagbro : Meh.
superswagbro's FML badges
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
superswagbro's favorite FMLs
Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML
by lingling / 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm / United States (Maryland) / Work
Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML
by intheairtonight / 04/25/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy
Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML
by lorahayes / 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous
Today, as a support worker, I spent 45 minutes making various attempts to calm a violent autistic kid. Just as soon as I was sure the crisis was over, he beat me as hard as he could with the "Things I Can Do When I'm Mad" book I'd given him. FML
by metallifreak44 / 11/14/2011 at 8:37am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by derbyboy / 10/19/2011 at 1:38am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Work
by jakewr / 07/02/2011 at 12:14am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/20/2011 at 12:03am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/26/2011 at 8:26am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
Today, my vegetarian housemate cleaned the fridge. He threw away all of the meat in our fridge and made a nice sign stating "Meat is Murder". I was storing roughly $1000 worth of filet mignon steaks and seafood for my sister's wedding. FML
by carnivore / 09/22/2009 at 5:48pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML
by mariokarter / 08/28/2009 at 12:41am / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 08/18/2009 at 1:06am / Kazakhstan (Almaty) / Miscellaneous
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…