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Today, I was yelled at and called a pedophile by a mom for talking to her 5 year old girl. I work at a library and she looked like she needed help. This is the third time it has happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38487) - you deserved it (2807)
On 04/25/2013 at 9:37pm - kids - by LibraryPedo (man) - United States (California)
Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38463) - you deserved it (4100)
On 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my husband laughed at me for farting in the bathtub; I lied by admitting to it. The fact is that I have enough back-fat to create suction against the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37075) - you deserved it (14020)
On 04/24/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was sent to group therapy. A girl spent twenty minutes telling us horrible details of having been raised incestuously. A side effect of my new medication is yawning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37788) - you deserved it (2812)
On 04/24/2013 at 2:23am - health - by fiercehawk (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45166) - you deserved it (18503)
On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - kids - by BIGCHEIFAAA (man) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to be playful and leave my girlfriend flowers and chocolates from an "Anonymous Admirer". She immediately dumped me, saying she couldn't be with someone who "isn't even as romantic as a stranger". Yep, I think I just got dumped for myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48781) - you deserved it (6603)
On 04/23/2013 at 7:22pm - love - by BestBF - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my mother and I saw a stall selling colourful treats at the shopping centre. Some were placed on small dishes, so we thought we'd sample their goods. Turns out that the colourful goodies that we'd bit into were very creative pieces of soap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16772) - you deserved it (36434)
On 04/23/2013 at 11:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, my husband rejected sleeping with me because he wants to "save his energy" for building his custom car. Apparently, I'm a "distraction." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37975) - you deserved it (4977)
On 04/23/2013 at 9:38am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43582) - you deserved it (5011)
On 04/23/2013 at 7:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (52231) - you deserved it (6810)
On 04/22/2013 at 4:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28581) - you deserved it (94501)
Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35673) - you deserved it (12261)
On 04/21/2013 at 10:56pm - misc - by Magicali (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48682) - you deserved it (2868)
On 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I had to convince my husband that I'm not having an affair all because I refused to have sex with him. Apparently the fact that I gave birth to our twins 10 days ago isn't a good enough reason to turn him down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60989) - you deserved it (5654)
On 04/21/2013 at 6:20am - intimacy - by loving wife - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I put up one of those hanging fly catchers in my room due to the unsettling amount of flies in the house. I remarked how stupid flies were to land on them. Within an hour, I got up and walked straight into it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20122) - you deserved it (38121)
On 04/21/2013 at 2:20am - misc - by Human fly - Canada (British Columbia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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