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Mobility
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Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17484) - you deserved it (26082)
On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States
Today, my house was damaged by a tornado. I called my mother to see if I could stay with her for a few days. Her response? "I warned you not to move in with a man. This is God's way of punishing you." I've been married to said man for almost a year now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28679) - you deserved it (1717)
On 05/20/2013 at 8:37pm - misc - by hotelbound - United States (Missouri)
Today, I'm planning my big sister's wedding. My long-term, live-in boyfriend walked by and saw me looking at the wedding tab on Pinterest, smirked, and said, "Don't get your hopes up." I had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36864) - you deserved it (5676)
On 05/20/2013 at 12:47am - love - by ForeverAlone (woman) - United States
Today, my parents posted on Facebook that they were excited that my sister was pregnant and couldn't wait to be grandparents. Last week I told them that I, a 33-year-old happily married woman, was pregnant and they told me I was ruining my life and encouraged me to have an abortion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43066) - you deserved it (2211)
On 05/20/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by pregnant loser apparently (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML
I agree, your life sucks (37803) - you deserved it (2890)
On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39235) - you deserved it (5447)
On 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I went to a local Indian takeaway, since I'm from India originally, and none of my friends speak Hindi. I went up to the counter and placed my order in Hindi with the seemingly Indian owner. He gave me a weird look and said, "Huh? Speak English, ya rimjob." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35479) - you deserved it (9778)
On 05/17/2013 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36209) - you deserved it (6386)
On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, at the supermarket, a man collapsed. I gave CPR while the cashier called for help. During this, the other patrons were complaining that no other register was open. Once the ambulance arrived, I returned to my cart to find items removed and 40 dollars taken from my purse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56972) - you deserved it (2976)
On 05/16/2013 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, while sitting at a red light with my window down, the asshat next to me flicked his still-lit cigarette away. It landed in my car and wedged between me and my seat. It burned a hole in my shirt and my seat, and burned my back and hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38766) - you deserved it (2533)
On 05/15/2013 at 5:47pm - work - by Seriously? (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78300) - you deserved it (4468)
On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)
Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45334) - you deserved it (15928)
On 05/12/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by peallow (woman) - Puerto Rico
Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35502) - you deserved it (6074)
On 05/11/2013 at 12:21pm - kids - by What the fuck, son? (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I saw my ex husband walking with his very beautiful, very pregnant wife. We divorced 7 months ago because he told me he was gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62340) - you deserved it (4132)
On 05/11/2013 at 9:32am - misc - by stephscort - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my brother's friend was about to drive home drunk, so I convinced him to think and not be stupid. It wasn't an invitation to puke on my floor then try to crawl into bed with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37162) - you deserved it (4653)
On 05/11/2013 at 5:52am - misc - by GaveAnInchTakeAMile (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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