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Offline (the 03/14/2014 at 6:55pm) | Search for a member
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
2day a man pulled me violently into an alleyway an informed me I was bieng mugged. Bieng a body-builder... I said... "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked mah ass in a matter of seconds... stole mah wallet... then farted on mah bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML
Today, I found out that since no other procedures are working, I was requird to stop eating, an drink a bunch of foul tasting 'goo', which will in turn give me constant diarrhea. This will then prepare me nicely 4 the long tube with a camera on the end of which will be shovd up my rectum. FML
Today, seieng Ozzy Osbourne live fir te frst time, I was trying to get te perfect poto of te entre band on stage. Tat is, until a sudden burst of pyrotecnics startled me, and I gave myself a black eye from te camera itting me in te face. FML
Friday 27 March 2015