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50 favourites
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Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23129) - you deserved it (28680)
Today, my kitchen is flooded, and according to my landlord, this is normal, because it rained last night. Funny, I thought the purpose of a roof was to stop water from getting in. Guess I was wrong. Silly me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35227) - you deserved it (2545)
On 06/08/2011 at 7:22am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France
Today, my husband and I got married. The only thing that is different so far is that he now thinks that it's okay to shit with the door open. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27442) - you deserved it (6383)
On 06/08/2011 at 2:55am - love - by anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I had sex with a juggalo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12023) - you deserved it (40831)
On 06/06/2011 at 7:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I signed up for an online dating site. In order to prove I was human and complete my registration, I had to pass a CAPTCHA. Coincidentally enough, the words in it were "depressed" and "loser". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24889) - you deserved it (5583)
On 06/05/2011 at 4:31pm - love - by Jakub89 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17516) - you deserved it (44316)
On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, when I weighed myself on my scale, it broke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27911) - you deserved it (19746)
On 05/30/2011 at 12:12pm - misc - by trev - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML
I agree, your life sucks (52415) - you deserved it (9889)
On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend convinced me to sneak out. As I was climbing out of my 3rd floor window, he got a text and moved the ladder. Now I'm in the hospital with two broken ribs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18481) - you deserved it (28933)
On 05/28/2011 at 2:45am - love - by epicfail (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my best friend thought the best time to tell me she was sleeping with my boyfriend was while we were acting in a play. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33635) - you deserved it (2281)
On 05/24/2011 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32586) - you deserved it (3568)
On 05/24/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by nr1234 (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I flew to Syracuse to visit my girlfriend. Upon arrival, I found out she's seeing someone else. I spent $400 to sleep on my ex-girlfriend's couch while she and her new boyfriend slept together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44094) - you deserved it (4155)
On 05/23/2011 at 4:42pm - love - by flightnfight (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17620) - you deserved it (31127)
On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -
Today, my pants felt a little looser than usual. Thinking I'd lost weight, I proudly went about my day. It wasn't until much later that I realised I hadn't lost any weight at all; my fly was down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8758) - you deserved it (18734)
On 05/21/2011 at 5:16pm - misc - by woodchuck0022 - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (33436) - you deserved it (3122)
On 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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