stringzofmyheart

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stringzofmyheart

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 December 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1444
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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stringzofmyheart's page activity

Visits<b>maxymum7</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:05pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:53pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 6:56am<b>lilauer13</b> - the 01/10/2011 at 8:10am<b>Lisa_Gaskarth</b> - the 11/26/2010 at 6:45am<b>LucyFur</b> - the 11/26/2010 at 2:20am<b>shoieb9</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 12:07am<b>blackninja747</b> - the 07/13/2010 at 6:57am<b>cristinaa_</b> - the 07/12/2010 at 7:18pm<b>281go</b> - the 07/11/2010 at 12:38am<b>Freakkshoooww</b> - the 06/28/2010 at 7:10am<b>Cuervo23</b> - the 06/08/2010 at 2:23am<b>lxclark</b> - the 06/04/2010 at 11:18pm<b>Yuppie</b> - the 06/01/2010 at 8:36am<b>GreekGoddessGirl</b> - the 05/22/2010 at 9:48am<b>illmatic2</b> - the 05/21/2010 at 5:36pm<b>Othello22</b> - the 05/19/2010 at 9:36pm<b>NSPrincess</b> - the 05/07/2010 at 3:55am

stringzofmyheart's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

stringzofmyheart's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend offered to give me a piggyback ride from the house to the car as means of avoiding walking in mud. Both aware of how tall he is, he crouched extra low and I jumped extra hard. This makes for a terrible example of leapfrog, and a faceplant in the mud. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 10:17pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment, when I came across a lacy black thong in the laundry. When confronted, he swore it was his. I don't know what's worse, the possibility that another woman left it there, or the idea that my boyfriend owns and wears women's lingerie. FML

by botharebad / 03/13/2010 at 12:14am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I woke up crying in the middle of a nightmare in which my boyfriend of 8 months shot me through the heart whilst laughing as I screamed 'I Love You'. After I told him about this, he took me into his arms as I cried, stroked my back and said, 'What kind of gun was it?' FML

by justlittleoldme / 03/12/2010 at 8:17am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Love

Today, my mum decided to teach me a lesson about carelessly leaving my wallet about. She left it on the floor so our puppy could use it and its contents as a chew toy. I was almost impressed to discover that he can eat three £20 notes and still have room for debit cards. FML

by MR / 03/10/2010 at 1:37pm / United Kingdom / Money

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

by Numbnuts / 03/07/2010 at 10:08pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my girlfriend started a fake argument and pretended to be mad at me for four days, which was almost enough time for the gigantic hickey that my best friend gave her on her neck to heal. FML

by mrniceguy / 02/23/2010 at 1:57pm / United States / Love

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

by meaganlea / 02/23/2010 at 12:17am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, my son learned about various animals in school, and how they urinate to mark their territory. Apparently, the entire second floor of my house is now my son's territory. FML

by grrrr / 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm / United States / Kids

Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML

by wishihadpockets / 01/28/2010 at 5:24am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter learned that if she rips a toy out of its package in front of a store employee, mommy will be forced to buy it. She now has two new toys today. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2010 at 3:09am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I dressed up, went over to my boyfriend and told him he could do anything he wanted. He said nothing and walked outside. I figured he'd come back in shortly, but when I looked out the window a few minutes later, he was building a snowman. FML

by dollybabe / 01/09/2010 at 4:20pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Love

Today, I was at a band practice. The band was talking to each other with language like "cadence", "resolution" and "consecutive fifths". When they spoke to me, they used terms like "tick", "bong", "ticky bong"; and "bongy tick". Musically, I feel like a baboon. FML

by Fredgruff / 01/09/2010 at 8:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have to train people overseas to do my job. If I succeed in teaching them what they need to know, then they get my job and I get fired. If they don't perform well, then as the trainer I get blamed, and get fired. FML

by ritualdevice / 12/15/2009 at 3:30am / Work

Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I decided to be funny and tell him I was Iron Man and nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2009 at 6:46pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking the final exam for one of my classes. The teacher came over to my desk, grabbed my test and ripped it in half. Then he grabbed my hand and read the note I had written on it to remind myself to pay rent. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2009 at 2:36pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous