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storyteller07

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storyteller07

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 November 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4226
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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storyteller07's page activity

Visits<b>username666</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 11:22am<b>limabean3</b> - the 04/01/2009 at 12:52am<b>BaiRen</b> - the 03/31/2009 at 9:21pm<b>bananamanama</b> - the 03/31/2009 at 1:04am<b>Kira</b> - the 03/30/2009 at 11:12pm<b>LovelyCutiePie</b> - the 03/30/2009 at 10:33pm<b>unibrowicorn</b> - the 03/30/2009 at 9:23pm

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storyteller07's favorite FMLs

Today, I was locked out of my house so I texted my cousin to come over and help me get in. She came over, stood on a chair and lifted me through the smallest unlocked window possible. Sadly, this was my bathroom window and I ended up head-first into my toilet. FML

#5358347
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32543) - you deserved it (9129)

On 09/19/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by GodDaughter (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I urgently needed to use the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. When I went to flush, it would not go down the pipes. After about ten panic filled minutes, I notice the cat litter box. I carefully scoop out my logs, and bury them in the cat litter. FML

#5325654
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17746) - you deserved it (44595)

On 09/18/2009 at 12:29am - animals - by Poowee (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML

#5315969
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38741) - you deserved it (9408)

On 09/17/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by sara (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML

#5309221
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22384) - you deserved it (77965)

On 09/17/2009 at 6:57am - work - by auscop (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went to the orthodontist to have my braces worked on. I accidentally swallowed some of the cleaning solution she used. She told me it would probably give me an upset stomach. Apparently, an upset stomach and crapping your pants means the same thing to an orthodontist. FML

#5306456
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34034) - you deserved it (3736)

On 09/17/2009 at 1:10am - health - by navyma - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, as I was walking home, three burly men suddenly began to approach me. Thinking they were going to mug me, I reached for my pocketknife and said "Stay away, I have a knife." Turns out they just wanted directions to an ice cream shop for their daughters, who were now bawling their eyes out. FML

#5306318
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11416) - you deserved it (49058)

On 09/17/2009 at 1:00am - kids - by almostmugged (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, there was a knock at my door, and I was greeted by a punch to the face. The man was the extremely angry "fiancé" of the girl I've been married to for just over a year. FML

#5287091
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51159) - you deserved it (2554)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:34am - love - by OhDamn (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML

#5247721
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45964) - you deserved it (3879)

On 09/14/2009 at 5:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I ignored my cat's incessant meowing, and pushed him away every time he wanted to be petted. The next time I walked downstairs I found him dead. FML

#5210731
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25447) - you deserved it (86976)

On 09/12/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59179) - you deserved it (15260)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my teenage son called me at work and started screaming abuse at me. He told me how he never wants to see me again and hopes I die a gruesome death. Why does he feel this way? I beat his high score on Bejewelled 2. FML

#5172036
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47325) - you deserved it (7903)

On 09/10/2009 at 6:00pm - kids - by Bewildered (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my boyfriend came in my room dressed as Harry Potter and declared that he was going to put his basilisk into my chamber of secrets. And yes, that was my first time. FML

#5168083
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32907) - you deserved it (7368)

On 09/10/2009 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by ginny (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was driving in the left lane and was suddenly hit by a woman who was in the right lane. I ran off the road, taking out a fence and totaling my car. When the cops asked the woman what happened she responded, "My tom-tom told me to turn left." FML

#5167647
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48887) - you deserved it (2207)

On 09/10/2009 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)



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