About stormchaser24 : *i have 92 FMLs because my idiot friend got on my computer and tried to post them.*
I strongly believe in the 2nd Amendment, and the Bill of Rights.
“The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. It is its natural manure.” — Thomas Jefferson
"If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around them will deprive the people of all property until their children wake up homeless on the continent their Fathers conquered."
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You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.
Today, I found there was a 4 year old boy behind me on my flight. When I looked at him, he screamed playfully and hid. I decided to play tiger with him. While I was grinning like a tiger and trying to scratch him, he smashed a water bottle across my face. I now have a black eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11593) - you deserved it (29232)
On 05/14/2011 at 9:32am - misc - by Plasticface (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I started petting my cousin's Doberman. Now, whenever I stop he growls menacingly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23643) - you deserved it (4410)
On 05/14/2011 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31543) - you deserved it (7622)
On 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by f*cks_sake - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had to run a mile in gym class for fitness training. If it takes longer than 10 minutes to run the stretch, you have to re-take it. My time was 10:02. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30019) - you deserved it (16918)
On 05/13/2011 at 5:10pm - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML
I agree, your life sucks (27397) - you deserved it (11198)
On 05/13/2011 at 3:20am - kids - by eenkoekje -
Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He asked for my license and registration so I reached for my center console. I was then greeted with a gun to my ear because my coffee cup supposedly looked like a gun. I stepped out of my car to apologize and I was hit with a big stick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33973) - you deserved it (7650)
On 05/13/2011 at 12:02am - misc - by phant776 (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend turned down a shower with me because he didn't want to get his hair wet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29268) - you deserved it (4171)
On 05/12/2011 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Georgia -
Today, my boyfriend came home from a camping trip and broke up with me. All because when he was watching the lake he was near, ripples formed. Apparently, this means God was telling him I'm impure and unable to be "saved by Christ" and therefore, a waste of his time. I dated this lunatic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28429) - you deserved it (981)
Today, I wore a Super Mario Brothers T-shirt to school that showed a picture of Mario with a mushroom above his head. I got suspended for "referencing illegal drugs". FML
I agree, your life sucks (38131) - you deserved it (4192)
On 05/11/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Sola -
Today, our school got portable classrooms for the construction on our school. I had to take a dump really bad, and had to use the built in bathroom. As I was in there I heard laughing. Turns out, every sound you make is an entire broadcast to the class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24187) - you deserved it (3014)
On 05/10/2011 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, our school got portable classrooms for the construction on our school. I had to take a dump really bad, and had to use the built in bathroom. As I was in there I heard laughing. Turns out, every sound you make is an entire broadcast to the class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24187) - you deserved it (3014)
On 05/10/2011 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat vomited. Covered it up with a bowl so you can clean it when you come home." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28482) - you deserved it (5513)
On 05/10/2011 at 12:37pm - animals - by coolbeans123 (woman) - Singapore
Today, an unpaid intern had his first day at my workplace of seven years. As a joke, my boss gave him the same challenge she gave me on my first day. The intern completed it in 37 minutes. We've always been told it's impossible. Guess we all have to start working harder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9288) - you deserved it (25094)
On 05/09/2011 at 1:33pm - work - by 19apollo91 (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, I was sitting on my balcony reading a book. My upstairs neighbors thought that would be a good time to water their flowers. I'm now drenched in water, as is my book. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24173) - you deserved it (2982)
Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11380) - you deserved it (64587)
On 05/07/2011 at 11:29am - misc - by BCBUDDY - United States (Florida)
Friday 24 May 2013
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