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Mobility
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Today, my parents staged a family intervention and gave me the grandest bollocking I've ever experienced in all my 22 years of life. They did this because my sister showed them a photo of me jokingly posing with three bottles of Bud Light at a party. Apparently, I'm an alcoholic in denial. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18394) - you deserved it (3102)
On 10/24/2011 at 6:46pm - misc - by wtf (man) - United Kingdom (York)
Today I had to listen to my father lecture me on all the potential dangers of Halloween. He has a speech for every holiday, every year. I'm 28 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20931) - you deserved it (2028)
On 10/24/2011 at 10:54am - misc - by StromyG2 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9336) - you deserved it (29010)
On 10/24/2011 at 1:04am - love - by ShitHappens - United States
Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26554) - you deserved it (5327)
On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19903) - you deserved it (15040)
Today, I went to the movies on a date. I went to pay for the tickets when I realized that I didn't have my wallet. Instead of my boyfriend paying, he laughed and paid for his own ticket. Then he went ahead and saw the movie without me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37826) - you deserved it (5237)
On 10/05/2011 at 12:16am - love - by myBFsucks - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I drove to the liquor store completely naked except for my dressing gown, with a carload of idiot stoners who ran in and stole vodka, tequila and whiskey. We drank in a bush. Last week I was a good citizen, and now I'm white trash. I'm not quite sure what happened in between. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5837) - you deserved it (42570)
Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23146) - you deserved it (2074)
On 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm - work - by SimpleSwimmer - United States (California)
Today, my friend decided to jump out of a moving car. I had to explain to the nice old lady who stopped that my friend who was convulsing on the ground wasn't on drugs, he's just really stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19784) - you deserved it (2005)
On 10/04/2011 at 11:10am - misc - by dmanrique - United States (Texas)
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Devastated, he withered onto the floor into an inconsolable wreck in front of dozens of people. The ribbon of embarrassment that went down my spine was too much for me to handle, so I had to tell him I was "only joking." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9771) - you deserved it (27632)
On 10/04/2011 at 1:22am - love - by backtosquareone - Asia/Pacific Region
Today, after a great treadmill run at my gym, I noticed a stain on my clothing. Apparently my nipple chafed so badly that it bled through my white t-shirt, and I'd walked around the gym completely oblivious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20793) - you deserved it (2454)
On 10/03/2011 at 7:19pm - health - by sorenips - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25776) - you deserved it (1967)
On 10/03/2011 at 2:08am - misc - by TheAnnoyedNeighbor - United States (New York)
Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I was about to invite him back to my place for a nightcap, he took out a catalog of Russian mail-order brides and asked for my help in picking out the best one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20972) - you deserved it (2555)
On 10/03/2011 at 12:15am - love - by NotRussian (woman) - United States
Today, I came home crying after my boyfriend dumped me for another girl. My dad told me to come tell him what was wrong. I sat down and let it all out, after which he looked up from his book, into my eyes, and gave me his loving advice: "Just cry about it and move on to another bastard." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20270) - you deserved it (6563)
On 10/02/2011 at 6:14pm - love - by bastard magnet - United States (California)
Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25045) - you deserved it (2148)
On 10/02/2011 at 2:36am - misc - by Emmy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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