About starsforbullets : I enjoy flames, they help pro-create toasty marshmallows.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I woke up to the sound of my roommate's alarm clock going off at 6:00 in the morning. His bedroom door was locked, and he was passed out in his bed from drinking too much. It rang continuously for five and a half hours before it finally ran out of batteries. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22272) - you deserved it (2040)
On 09/06/2010 at 2:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I discovered how my ex-girlfriend exacted her revenge. Every item of clothing I own now has sequins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17365) - you deserved it (8354)
On 08/05/2010 at 1:00pm - love - by Luke - United Kingdom (West Berkshire)
Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24790) - you deserved it (24648)
On 08/04/2010 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by kinky - United States (Virginia)
Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24790) - you deserved it (24648)
On 08/04/2010 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by kinky - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31613) - you deserved it (7954)
On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)
Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31655) - you deserved it (7555)
On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States
Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22619) - you deserved it (7479)
On 07/03/2010 at 2:49am - misc - by thesadone - United States (California)
I agree, your life sucks (31927) - you deserved it (4564)
On 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30087) - you deserved it (2504)
On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States
Today, my pissed off girlfriend used window marker to write racist comments on my car window. This would include: nazi symbols, white power, and a few others I won't mention. I live in a predominately black neighborhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24991) - you deserved it (2936)
On 02/10/2010 at 4:08am - misc - by ... - United States
Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18190) - you deserved it (2550)
On 01/14/2010 at 4:56pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18190) - you deserved it (2550)
On 01/14/2010 at 4:56pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I bought a new Siamese Fighting Fish. I was so happy with my new fish so I bought him an expensive lovely bowl, some weeds, and a toy for the bowl. I left the room to get the fish food. When I returned, the fish was gone, and the cat was sitting on the table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15892) - you deserved it (6018)
On 01/05/2010 at 12:15am - animals - by bels12 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was walking in the park when I was hit on the shin by a red ball. I was confused, until it was followed by an enormous German Shepherd dog going at top speed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22222) - you deserved it (1581)
On 10/26/2009 at 12:24pm - health - by Lizofsmeg (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)
Today, I searched myself on Facebook. I have a fan page made by some girl in Wisconsin. She has pictures of me on it. Can you say stalker? FML
I agree, your life sucks (28594) - you deserved it (3917)
On 10/25/2009 at 8:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Monday 20 May 2013
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