Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

st333ph

Search for a member

st333ph

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8402
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About st333ph : So I guess one of my awkward and ridiculous comments brought you here. Well here's some info.

I'm fifteen. I'm a swimmer currently in high school.
I read FML's simply when I'm bored or when I'm just feeling like I don't want to do my work. Or I'm about to go to sleep or I'm doing my business on the toilet.

Sarcasm is what usually comes out of my mouth 88% of the time, sometimes a little too blunt 12% of the time.

st333ph's page activity

Visits<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:56pm<b>Earthdforce</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 9:11pm<b>seth_ramey</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 3:59am<b>origamidragon</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:35pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 8:47pm<b>aamir251</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 6:20am<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 1:14am<b>adamant84</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 7:15am<b>Nate2187</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 4:30pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 1:24am<b>smrn95</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 4:58pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 5:01pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 5:09pm<b>rosha267</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 9:49am<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 1:44pm<b>hofferman</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 1:19am<b>Indianboy9321</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 2:41pm<b>DaFoo</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:22am

Fucked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 11:01pm

st333ph's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of st333ph's badges

st333ph's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML

#19287626
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41881) - you deserved it (3392)

On 03/16/2012 at 6:38am - love - by elisabeth_pwnes - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML

#19279132
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33187) - you deserved it (5874)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML

#19279132
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33187) - you deserved it (5874)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was watching a kid at school walk like a gangster. My teacher was standing there, so I stood behind the kid and walked like him, laughing to myself, at which point my teacher took me to one side and told me the kid was handicapped. FML

#19277499
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8939) - you deserved it (53595)

On 03/14/2012 at 4:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up sweating and gasping for air after having a terrible nightmare. The nightmare involved my deceased mother-in-law bitching me out for being a bad influence on her daughter and threatening to cut my nuts off. Even in death, she won't leave me be. FML

#19270798
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25697) - you deserved it (2236)

On 03/13/2012 at 12:13pm - misc - by lanu (man) - United States

Today, I was shaving naked in my cold bathroom before showering. My wife walked up behind me, yelled "Shrinkage!" and flicked the head of my penis as hard as she could. FML

#19261628
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31120) - you deserved it (4107)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML

#19255616
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32338) - you deserved it (3045)

On 03/11/2012 at 3:36am - love - by Tristan Brantley - United States (California)

Today, in the locker room at work, someone tried writing "douche bag" on my locker, and misspelled it four times before apparently giving up. FML

#19255450
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21752) - you deserved it (1845)

On 03/11/2012 at 1:39am - work - by The Last One (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend over Skype. I said I loved her and hoped we would be together forever. She responded by singing Who Wants to Live Forever into her mic. FML

#19250645
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19655) - you deserved it (3659)

On 03/10/2012 at 10:16am - love - by callen5 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

#19231418
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11707) - you deserved it (40421)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:29am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in the middle of sex my boyfriend asked if he could use the bathroom. It would've been fine, if he didn't fall asleep on the toilet. FML

#19216663
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (2587)

On 03/04/2012 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by Karen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21665) - you deserved it (27374)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21665) - you deserved it (27374)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30263) - you deserved it (9472)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30263) - you deserved it (9472)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2: School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: