About st333ph : So I guess one of my awkward and ridiculous comments brought you here. Well here's some info.
I'm fifteen. I'm a swimmer currently in high school.
I read FML's simply when I'm bored or when I'm just feeling like I don't want to do my work. Or I'm about to go to sleep or I'm doing my business on the toilet.
Sarcasm is what usually comes out of my mouth 88% of the time, sometimes a little too blunt 12% of the time.
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Today, as a prank, I set my wallpaper on my iTouch to a photo that makes the screen look broken. I pretended to freak out, showing my dad that it broke. Good news: My prank worked. Bad news: He threw the iTouch out the window in rage. It had 59 gigs in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9577) - you deserved it (41348)
On 06/19/2010 at 1:49am - misc - by Skrewed (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. While I was asleep, he drew a face on my stomach and when I woke up he was talking to it. He said it would be less weird if he was talking to my stomach with a face on it, representing the baby. According to him, our child is going to have a mustache. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14729) - you deserved it (18242)
On 06/14/2010 at 7:13pm - kids - by gibsonSG323 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, it's my Nana's birthday and to say she is having a good time is an understatement. She's so drunk, she took out her false teeth tried to put them in her dog's mouth. When she failed, she tried the cat's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24766) - you deserved it (2923)
On 06/13/2010 at 10:36am - misc - by Cat (woman) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)
Today, my siblings overpowered me and duct taped me to a chair. Helpless, I had to wait until my dad got home so he could help me. Instead, the first thing he did was reach for his camera to take a picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27727) - you deserved it (6868)
On 06/12/2010 at 2:55pm - kids - by kingwalrus - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, I was at a public pool. A very fat kid yelled, "Cannon Ball!" He jumped right on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39348) - you deserved it (3051)
On 06/10/2010 at 3:59pm - misc - by Collin - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Suddenly, he grabbed my 'lower' lips and moved them in a talking motion, proclaiming that "the talking vagina declares war and wants to conquer the great penis." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41549) - you deserved it (13498)
On 06/09/2010 at 7:34am - intimacy - by thetalkingvagina (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went downstairs after a family argument. The front door was kicked in, the sink faucet was snapped off, and there was broken plates all over the kitchen floor. I later found out that the argument was over who left the refrigerator door open. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24567) - you deserved it (1575)
On 06/06/2010 at 7:48pm - misc - by mark (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26034) - you deserved it (3864)
On 06/06/2010 at 5:53pm - misc - by LilyL (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I saw a video of me from over the weekend, naked, pretending to be a duck. What the fuck happened that night? FML
I agree, your life sucks (14772) - you deserved it (40362)
On 05/25/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by laurenraeee - United States (Utah)
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has a YouTube channel devoted to taking the camera out whenever he has to fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20034) - you deserved it (2905)
On 05/25/2010 at 12:55am - misc - by alyssac11 - United States (Michigan)
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he played with and named my boobs. Complete with a full skit where "Maxie" killed "Nathanial." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24327) - you deserved it (6047)
On 05/23/2010 at 5:10am - intimacy - by Maxie-Nathanial - United States
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11802) - you deserved it (31070)
On 05/22/2010 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39351) - you deserved it (10318)
On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was at a concert. During the concert, my shoelaces went undone, so I bent down to tie them. Not two seconds later, the girl behind me jumped on my shoulders and refused to get down. She said "tall guys" are the best to ride on during concerts. My name is Maria. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25431) - you deserved it (2689)
On 05/18/2010 at 2:57pm - health - by tallwoman (woman) - Denmark (Arhus)
Today, me and a couple of friends decided to go camping in a national park . When we got there, a ranger came up to us and said, "There have been many sightings of coyotes, don't worry, if they charge you, they'll bluff and flee at the last moment." We met a coyote, it didn't bluff. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20366) - you deserved it (2275)
On 05/17/2010 at 7:00pm - misc - by Coyote (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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