About st333ph : So I guess one of my awkward and ridiculous comments brought you here. Well here's some info.
I'm fifteen. I'm a swimmer currently in high school.
I read FML's simply when I'm bored or when I'm just feeling like I don't want to do my work. Or I'm about to go to sleep or I'm doing my business on the toilet.
Sarcasm is what usually comes out of my mouth 88% of the time, sometimes a little too blunt 12% of the time.
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Today, I woke up to find that my cat had knocked over a $35 can of powdered baby formula, and there were TWO different colonies of ants warring over the bounty all over the counter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14635) - you deserved it (2646)
On 11/21/2010 at 9:51pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to find that my cat had knocked over a $35 can of powdered baby formula, and there were TWO different colonies of ants warring over the bounty all over the counter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14635) - you deserved it (2646)
On 11/21/2010 at 9:51pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while my boyfriend was going down on me, he fell asleep right between my legs. The worst part was I only noticed when he started snoring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23172) - you deserved it (4032)
On 11/18/2010 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend told me to Google how to last longer in bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19295) - you deserved it (7953)
On 11/16/2010 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came up and was being nice. He said, "What can I get you two gentlemen?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24805) - you deserved it (3747)
Today, I tried on the new dress I bought for myself. I, for once, thought I looked pretty all right. I asked my dog, "How do I look?" and she threw up on my pillow. My brother can't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22166) - you deserved it (3509)
On 11/14/2010 at 4:42am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I discovered I am the "before picture" in an internet weight loss advert. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34850) - you deserved it (6334)
On 11/08/2010 at 4:11pm - misc - by beforegirl (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I found my son's iPod touch and was looking at a light-saber app. He walked into the living room to see me fighting the cat and making sound effects to myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4837) - you deserved it (19809)
On 11/08/2010 at 1:07am - animals - by yay! - United States (Arizona)
Today, my twin sister sent a nude picture to her boyfriend, who then forwarded it on to everyone else. Everyone else thinks it's me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28631) - you deserved it (2256)
On 11/05/2010 at 7:17pm - intimacy - by jsquared - United States (California)
Today, my 5 year old son and I went out. As I was looking in the window display of a shop, I turned around to witness my son pooping in an open manhole on the street. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23189) - you deserved it (7817)
On 11/04/2010 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my 5 year old son and I went out. As I was looking in the window display of a shop, I turned around to witness my son pooping in an open manhole on the street. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23189) - you deserved it (7817)
On 11/04/2010 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29131) - you deserved it (12822)
On 11/04/2010 at 5:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, waking up I noticed that my female boss had texted me during the night, telling me she wants me bad. I'm a woman, happily married to a man, and now have to turn her down somehow and not get fired in the process. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26256) - you deserved it (2159)
On 11/03/2010 at 10:35am - intimacy - by tuppu (woman) - Finland
Today, I'm training to be a nurse in a hospital. Our teacher asked for a volunteer to demonstrate how bed restraints work. After I was shackled to the bed she said, "Now let's make sure they work. Are you ticklish?" My entire class tickled me until I screamed, cried and nearly wet my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25169) - you deserved it (3626)
On 11/03/2010 at 8:08am - work - by nurse (woman) - Reserved
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49164) - you deserved it (9961)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Monday 20 May 2013
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