st333ph

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st333ph

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 May 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15868
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About st333ph : So I guess one of my awkward and ridiculous comments brought you here. Well here's some info.

I'm fifteen. I'm a swimmer currently in high school.
I read FML's simply when I'm bored or when I'm just feeling like I don't want to do my work. Or I'm about to go to sleep or I'm doing my business on the toilet.

Sarcasm is what usually comes out of my mouth 88% of the time, sometimes a little too blunt 12% of the time.

st333ph's page activity

Visits<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 11:28am<b>Dogluvr1197</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 9:51am<b>djrodcol</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 3:47pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 10:56pm<b>thatoneguy255</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 5:48am<b>Kieranr10</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 1:42am<b>bghost89</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 2:05am<b>Rais</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 3:19am<b>Ultigmr</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:21pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 8:53am<b>aj9319</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:52pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:20pm<b>Mons</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 3:43pm<b>ijulez</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 1:45pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:32am<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:19am<b>born_hustla</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 9:09am<b>pred8885</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 8:13am

Fucked!<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 5:10am<b>DevilsMetsGiants</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 9:14am<b>rafa015</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:40pm

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st333ph's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

by Anonymous / 09/07/2009 at 5:20pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I met my boyfriend's mother for the first time. She greeted us holding a baby, and I told her how cute her son was. She told me that it was her grandson. Turns out my boyfriend is the father. We're 16. FML

by Notyourstepmom / 09/07/2009 at 2:22pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting changed in front of my room mate of two years. Feeling comfortable, I took off all my clothes and started putting new clothes on. I asked why she wasn't taking her eyes off my naked body. She said "I'm loving the view. Didn't you know I'm a lesbian?" FML

by EyesOffMe / 09/07/2009 at 12:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML

by M.L. / 09/06/2009 at 5:09pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I got my renewed driver's license. It clearly indicates 'Sex: F'. My beard and penis beg to differ. FML

by HeShe / 09/06/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend got drunk. We tried to get him into a cab, he punched me in the face, three chavs then accosted me, accusing me of trying to mug him. I was then beaten up by said chavs and then the police charged me for being drunk and disorderly. FML

by DrunkenValor / 09/06/2009 at 12:03am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Health

Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML

by flexibleflatulance / 09/04/2009 at 11:07pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I skipped class to take the girl I like to the airport, and after giving her a goodbye hug I kissed her on the cheek. She laughed and said "Maybe we should discuss some boundaries when I get back." FML

by strikeout / 09/03/2009 at 10:47pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was following my dad while texting, not really watching where we're going. Suddenly, he ran ahead and I looked up to see what he was doing. We were in the men's bathroom. There were 3 guys at the urinals. I'm a 15 year old girl. FML

Today, I tried to wash my cat in the shower, conveniently naked myself. He disapproved, scratching my man-parts and nicking a vein. I just got back from the hospital with a blood infection, swollen nuts, and an hole in my butt where I had to get a shot of antibiotics. FML

by keeperstride / 09/03/2009 at 3:55pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I fell asleep during naptime. I'm the teacher. FML

by yogabbagabba / 09/03/2009 at 1:05am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML

by Hairball / 09/01/2009 at 2:05pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed with myself for lasting through multiple songs. Then I realized her ipod was playing a medley. I only lasted 3 1/2 minutes. FML

by sadinthesack / 08/31/2009 at 2:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was hurrying for the bus home from work. It was raining and I had my umbrella up. As I hurried by two women, I felt my umbrella hit one of them on the head. I turned to apologise and saw her standing with her hands on her newly bald head. My umbrella had lifted her wig off her head. FML

by Karen / 08/31/2009 at 10:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation

Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML

by crawfo / 08/31/2009 at 9:54am / Australia (Queensland) / Love