About st333ph : So I guess one of my awkward and ridiculous comments brought you here. Well here's some info.
I'm fifteen. I'm a swimmer currently in high school.
I read FML's simply when I'm bored or when I'm just feeling like I don't want to do my work. Or I'm about to go to sleep or I'm doing my business on the toilet.
Sarcasm is what usually comes out of my mouth 88% of the time, sometimes a little too blunt 12% of the time.
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Today, There was a fire in my building and the fire alarm went off when I was in the shower, I live on the 5th floor and had to run down the stairs naked because the fire was next door. When I got downstairs I got a $500 ticket for public nudity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40343) - you deserved it (7601)
On 08/11/2009 at 3:21pm - misc - by BulgaBoi21 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11623) - you deserved it (39462)
On 08/10/2009 at 2:12am - love - by HouseMdFangirl (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32938) - you deserved it (7379)
On 08/09/2009 at 7:43pm - misc - by grabber (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I gathered both mine and my girlfriend's families secretly to a restaurant. I paid the restaurant to play romantic music, and paid for the best table available. As soon as we finished our meal, our families gathered around and I proposed. She laughed and said no way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (81605) - you deserved it (6013)
On 08/09/2009 at 9:48am - love - by gtrs750 (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I got a call from my parents' divorce lawyer. When I answered the phone, she thought I was my mother and told me the details about my parent's divorce. I'm a 13-year-old boy who sounds like a woman and just learned that my parents are separating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52879) - you deserved it (2423)
On 08/07/2009 at 11:57pm - misc - by madaskueuchiha (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got a call from my parents' divorce lawyer. When I answered the phone, she thought I was my mother and told me the details about my parent's divorce. I'm a 13-year-old boy who sounds like a woman and just learned that my parents are separating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52879) - you deserved it (2423)
On 08/07/2009 at 11:57pm - misc - by madaskueuchiha (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I met a hot guy at a club and we really hit it off. We went back to his place and we got down to business. After, I noticed he had an iPod Touch on his nightstand. I complimented him on it and he responded with, "Yeah, my girlfriend gave it to me as an anniversary present." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14766) - you deserved it (46487)
On 08/07/2009 at 1:09pm - love - by accidentalslut (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19259) - you deserved it (46646)
On 08/07/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by scaredshitless (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, a very good platonic friend of mine said he had a question to ask me. Jokingly, I threw my arms around his neck and said 'Oh yes, yes, a thousand times yes!' When I sat back down, I saw tears in his eyes, and he said 'You've made me the happiest man alive' as he pulled a small box out of his coat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20740) - you deserved it (74494)
On 08/06/2009 at 5:25pm - love - by dundundadumb (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (96169) - you deserved it (3050)
On 08/05/2009 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39795) - you deserved it (4968)
On 08/04/2009 at 4:21pm - love - by Angry (woman) - United States
Today, I had my first blow job. My girlfriend thought it would be sexy to "caress" my ball sack. By caress she meant bitch slap from side to side. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52051) - you deserved it (7053)
On 08/03/2009 at 10:37pm - intimacy - by BeboKhaos (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44412) - you deserved it (1579)
On 08/02/2009 at 8:59pm - misc - by amburrr (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my Dad sent me an e-mail wishing me a "Happy 21st Birthday, sweetheart!" The message went on and on about how much he loves and misses me and wishes we were closer, and can't believe how fast I'm growing up. I'm 23 and my birthday is in December. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41326) - you deserved it (1734)
On 08/01/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my father taught my son to pee on trees outside. We went to the mall later and my son decided to practice what he'd learned on a potted plant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32322) - you deserved it (4370)
On 08/01/2009 at 2:35am - kids - by jcesom (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Friday 24 May 2013
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