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About st333ph : So I guess one of my awkward and ridiculous comments brought you here. Well here's some info.
I'm fifteen. I'm a swimmer currently in high school.
I read FML's simply when I'm bored or when I'm just feeling like I don't want to do my work. Or I'm about to go to sleep or I'm doing my business on the toilet.
Sarcasm is what usually comes out of my mouth 88% of the time, sometimes a little too blunt 12% of the time.
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Today, while skiing on Mammoth Mountain, a man dressed in an Easter Bunny costume snowboarded into me and sent me flying. Not only did he hurt my wrist, he also threw an Easter egg at me, yelled "Happy Easter", and snowboarded away. FML
Today, my boyfriend finally found a roommate after hopelessly looking for months. I was really anxious to meet the guy because I would most likely be spending a good amount of time with him. Who did my boyfriend end up picking as his new roommate? My ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I went on my first official date I've been on since my divorce. Things were going great until he ordered his fourth 32oz beer; he got hammered and became a horny octopus. Oh, and he farted whiled trying to give me a goodnight kiss. FML
Today, I sprained my sternum in my rugby match. I now can't yell, laugh, cough, inhale or exhale fully, or sneeze without a sharp pain shooting through my chest. I have a pollen allergy, and sneeze every 5 or 10 minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said: "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML
Thursday 11 September 2014