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st333ph

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st333ph
  • Town/Country : merp
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 May 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 3802
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About st333ph : So I guess one of my awkward and ridiculous comments brought you here. Well here's some info.

I'm fifteen. I'm a swimmer currently in high school.
I read FML's simply when I'm bored or when I'm just feeling like I don't want to do my work. Or I'm about to go to sleep or I'm doing my business on the toilet.

Sarcasm is what usually comes out of my mouth 88% of the time, sometimes a little too blunt 12% of the time.

st333ph's last visitors

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st333ph's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out the people I babysit for have a nanny cam. Problem is, when I'm there, I act out scenarios in which I have the sweetest boyfriend. I also say his parts out loud in a man's voice. FML

#17932386
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10384) - you deserved it (29293)

On 10/08/2011 at 12:49am - work - by Laura - United States

Today, a customer handed me the ankle-length hosiery she had just used to try on some shoes, and as I sat there feeling the warm dampness of them in the palm of my hand, she said "You should throw those away, I have a toe fungus." FML

#17916744
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26331) - you deserved it (2335)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got mad at my 4 year old son for cussing me out. Afterwards, I went upstairs to get ready for the day. When I came back downstairs I found him pooping on my brand new leather couch. FML

#17880683
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25872) - you deserved it (10207)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:10pm - kids - by kewtness_17 - United States (Texas)

Today, I logged on to Facebook to find that my boyfriend's relationship status had changed to in a relationship with his ex. I asked him about it, and all he said was, "I guess I forgot to break up with you." FML

#17880636
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33341) - you deserved it (2127)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML

#17874852
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27612) - you deserved it (2758)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm - kids - by jesus christ - United States

Today, my credit card got blocked. Apparently, my bank thinks buying a $130 flat iron online is suspicious. FML

#17836225
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20929) - you deserved it (5032)

On 09/26/2011 at 12:29am - money - by jpmetz - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was sent home from work early because of structural issues. I walked in on my unemployed boyfriend cuddling another woman on the couch. When I confronted them, he freaked out and kept trying to convince me that I was dreaming. I don't know what I ever saw in this loser. FML

#17811701
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34888) - you deserved it (3943)

On 09/23/2011 at 7:04am - love - by alone - China

Today, my class was assigned lockers. Out of all the lockers in the entire school, mine is the only one to still have graffiti on it from last year. The tagger's choice of words? "Poop face." FML

#17804369
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19024) - you deserved it (2306)

On 09/22/2011 at 12:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML

#17801637
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10833) - you deserved it (38149)

On 09/22/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by mortenp - United States (Maryland)

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

#17789200
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25905) - you deserved it (34492) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/20/2011 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by Prinpette - France

Today, it was my first day as a police officer. A couple of hours into the shift, we got a call. A man was drunkenly jeering and urinating on parked cars. That man turned out to be my father. FML

#17787359
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35175) - you deserved it (2692)

On 09/20/2011 at 10:56am - work - by PC Jones (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my ex, whom I haven't seen in two years, contacted me. She was great company back in the day, wild in bed, the most attractive person I've ever dated, and totally uninterested in a serious relationship. She wants me to fix her computer. FML

#17782982
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22309) - you deserved it (4148)

On 09/19/2011 at 8:20pm - love - by Tech Savvy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

#17751753
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29989) - you deserved it (4085)

On 09/15/2011 at 4:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, as my girlfriend and I were on a romantic dinner for two, I tried pulling out the chair for her. She fell. FML

#17737171
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22269) - you deserved it (5378)

On 09/13/2011 at 4:13pm - misc - by jake (man) - United States

Today, I pretended to drunk text some friends. When in all reality I was sitting home all alone. I don't know what's worse: that I pretended that I was social and drunk, or that the friend I said I was with was actually with them. FML

#17708531
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7675) - you deserved it (34310)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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