Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

spearodude

Search for a member

spearodude

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2317
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

spearodude's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 3:33am<b>seriousbro</b> - the 06/27/2012 at 6:09am

spearodude's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

spearodude's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

#2855395
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80962) - you deserved it (3777)

On 06/13/2009 at 11:13am - misc - by Toothy_Peg (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was at the cafeteria of my school with my boyfriend and he dumped me. I was kinda expecting it. What I wasn't expecting was that he'd start running in front of everyone, screaming "FREEEEEEEEEDOM!" at the top of his lungs and that he'd kiss the first girl he saw. FML

#2822887
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87443) - you deserved it (9937)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:39am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

#2796637
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78023) - you deserved it (21857)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
819 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119120) - you deserved it (73900)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had to play the role of superman in a production on stage. They had to stuff my underwear because my 'thing' wasn't big enough. FML

#2769644
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72593) - you deserved it (6577)

On 06/10/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by superman_not (man) - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)

Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML

#2681681
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45277) - you deserved it (122207)

On 06/07/2009 at 2:02am - love - by dawg3360 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I won $200 a contest at a bar. The manager took me to a vault where money collected from the strippers go into a pool. He told me that at least half of the bills were slid through a strippers butt crack so I was to "choose wisely". FML

#2427031
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41664) - you deserved it (8234)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:39am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I kissed my husband and said "I love you." Thats when our 5 year old son said to my husband "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML

#2158640
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57887) - you deserved it (3646)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my cat was hit by a car. I took it to the vet expecting the worst but they told me that she’d be fine. I was so happy I didn't even mind paying the $50 bill. The next morning my cat was dead. Having her put down humanely would have cost $45, I paid $5 extra to have her die in my kitchen. FML

#2137962
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54177) - you deserved it (3726)

On 05/21/2009 at 4:06am - animals - by georgia819 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my friend Kate and I were helping build a playground. Halfway through, a construction worker asks where we go to school. I told him we graduated and proudly held degrees in psych. The construction worker stopped mid-dig, glanced at us sadly and said, "yeah that's what my degree's in too." FML

#2001814
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46921) - you deserved it (7811)

On 05/17/2009 at 12:20am - work - by blairheir721 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML

Today, a hot girl got into the elevator just as I took a bite out of my Three Musketeers bar. I instinctively smiled at her and chocolate drool poured out of my mouth. FML

#1658004
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26108) - you deserved it (54926)

On 05/05/2009 at 10:17am - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally got my cast taken off my leg after a long month of crutches. I was so excited, until four dead spiders fell out. FML

#1479703
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79732) - you deserved it (3971)

On 04/30/2009 at 12:53am - animals - by dasbooot (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML

#1346080
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82136) - you deserved it (5549)

On 04/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by calliefml (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML

#1091481
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61171) - you deserved it (13868)

On 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: