Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

spearodude

Search for a member

spearodude

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3957
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

spearodude's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 3:33am<b>seriousbro</b> - the 06/27/2012 at 6:09am

spearodude's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

spearodude's favorite FMLs

Today, I witnessed the miracle of life. More specifically, my cat giving birth on my bed at four in the morning. FML

#16359645
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35789) - you deserved it (7041)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:03pm - animals - by KittenTime (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, it was my birthday. Some 17 year olds will receive cars as presents from their parents. Mine, however, booked me a plot in the local graveyard. FML

#16342840
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44994) - you deserved it (4762)

On 05/25/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Brilliant... (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML

#16341966
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48901) - you deserved it (9205)

On 05/25/2011 at 12:06pm - love - by Username - United States (California)

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

#16339516
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52069) - you deserved it (17633)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -

Today, I had to explain to my sobbing teenage daughter why you can't get pregnant from masturbating. FML

#16331288
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53380) - you deserved it (8690)

On 05/24/2011 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by asnolt (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over a glass bottle. My legs looked like a disco ball. FML

#16325650
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35717) - you deserved it (8685)

On 05/24/2011 at 8:33am - health - by tash (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11382) - you deserved it (63699)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -

Today, it was my first day as an animal control officer. My first dispatch was to collect a dog that had been hit by a car. I had to clean up my dead dog on my first day of a job that barely pays rent. FML

#16245376
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52906) - you deserved it (3747)

On 05/18/2011 at 10:48pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I came home to my front door open and a homeless man taking a 'bath' in my sink. If this wasn't bad enough, he refused to leave because 'finders keepers!' FML

#16243559
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37966) - you deserved it (3792)

On 05/18/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Ally (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38936) - you deserved it (10502)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

#16205540
347 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63556) - you deserved it (9887)

On 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm - health - by Bobby M - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, my 12 year old son came home from school and informed me that he bought an air guitar for $20. He honestly thinks this is a good price. FML

#16113855
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35291) - you deserved it (11568)

On 05/10/2011 at 1:18am - kids - by Whatdididowrong? -

Today, I knocked on the door of the bathroom to make sure nobody was in there before I walked in. Then I remembered I live alone. FML

#16061392
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30069) - you deserved it (14357)

On 05/05/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by liynda - Canada

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

#16009360
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14940) - you deserved it (44871)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:21pm - animals - by Cassie -

Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML

#15948281
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65747) - you deserved it (7397)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: