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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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spamtastic404

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spamtastic404
  • Town/Country : Los Noches, Hueco Mundo
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2097
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About spamtastic404 : i is noob cake

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spamtastic404's favorite FMLs

Today, my crush walked me home. As my mom opens the door, she tells me in Russian how ugly he is, and that I have extremely bad taste. Out of all the languages in the world, he happens to be fluent in Russian. FML

#13432971 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (32145) - you deserved it (2274)

On 10/13/2010 at 10:45am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Brunei Darussalam

Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML

#5796915 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (24166) - you deserved it (5978)

On 10/12/2009 at 2:10pm - health - by Few_Absolutes (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was driving in the left lane and was suddenly hit by a woman who was in the right lane. I ran off the road, taking out a fence and totaling my car. When the cops asked the woman what happened she responded, "My tom-tom told me to turn left." FML

#5167647 (219)

I agree, your life sucks (39224) - you deserved it (1376)

On 09/10/2009 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML

#4933603 (266)

I agree, your life sucks (44800) - you deserved it (3099)

On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after not having sex for nearly a year and a half, an opportunity arose. I couldn't get it up. FML

#4805329 (166)

I agree, your life sucks (47622) - you deserved it (7775)

On 08/25/2009 at 4:47am - intimacy - by 2yearsofHotSexThenThis (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML

#4673205 (319)

I agree, your life sucks (6284) - you deserved it (66751)

On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that not only has my father been cheating on my mother with another woman, but they have a child together with the same name as me. FML

#4403752 (180)

I agree, your life sucks (75401) - you deserved it (2062)

On 08/09/2009 at 5:26am - misc - by redbluegreen (woman) - United States (Oregon)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML

#4308181 (309)

I agree, your life sucks (21850) - you deserved it (59844)

On 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was wearing my favorite tube top to the mall when a girl walked up and said, "I have that exact same skirt, why are you wearing it as a top?" I've been wearing it for two years, and no one's bothered to tell me. FML

#4290695 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (10754) - you deserved it (34433)

On 08/04/2009 at 7:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my wedding day, and while I was standing next to my husband in front of all of our guests, I was rocking on my heels because I was nervous. I rocked too far and fell backward. My husband didn't come to help me up. He just said at the top of his lungs, "FAIL!" FML

#4219573 (237)

I agree, your life sucks (50432) - you deserved it (10398)

On 08/02/2009 at 12:21am - love - by thefailure (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I decided to make a place in my house for my friends to sign called “The Friend Wall." By sign I meant sign, not draw body parts. This afternoon I ate lunch next to a basketball-sized vagina and a monumentally large blue and purple penis. FML

#4031081 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (8371) - you deserved it (41192)

On 07/25/2009 at 2:32pm - misc - by rbates - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML

#3921342 (203)

I agree, your life sucks (35224) - you deserved it (20228)

On 07/21/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by emperor (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)

Today, I checked an old photosharing account. I got a new phone last year and didn't realize all the pictures I took with the new phone would still automatically upload to my account. Unknowingly, I posted naked pics of myself online. Not one of my friends told me. FML

#3884165 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (10196) - you deserved it (37376)

On 07/19/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by nudie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was meeting the mayor of a major city as part of an internship program. Seated directly in front of him during his presentation on the budget crisis, he unleashed an enormous, foul fart in front of the entire audience. And then blamed it on me, everyone believed him. FML

#3859879 (71)

I agree, your life sucks (41700) - you deserved it (1710)

On 07/18/2009 at 4:10pm - work - by justdoingmyjob (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my class was attempting to raise money for me through a bake sale because some girl spread a false rumor that I was raped and that my father was going to disown me. The whole school believes it and my biology teacher took me aside and asked if I needed someone to confide in. FML

#3806644 (237)

I agree, your life sucks (50140) - you deserved it (1757)

On 07/16/2009 at 4:32pm - misc - by dork (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)