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soulebelius

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soulebelius
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1503
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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soulebelius's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor asked to come over and use my laptop. She showed up drunk, grabbed my boobs, and asked if I'd ever had a lesbian experience. We both have husbands and kids; the kids were in the room. FML

#21109873
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41353) - you deserved it (3575)

On 04/10/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by freakedout (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, due to my wife saying I never cook and we always order pizza, I spent a good hour preparing dinner. While serving it to my kids, they started complaining. My wife told them to shut up. When she took a bite, she looked up at me, smiled, and said, "Do you, you know, want to just order pizza?" FML

#21108567
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37257) - you deserved it (4881)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by Max - United States

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, my coworkers continued their new favorite game: staring at me in total unnerving silence. I can't help but be reminded of serial killers. FML

#21103796
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30044) - you deserved it (2580)

On 04/03/2014 at 4:53pm - work - by Welshite - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend the dentist said my blood pressure was high. He was more interested in the fact that the dentist took my blood pressure than my blood pressure being high. FML

#21095607
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31052) - you deserved it (8702)

On 03/24/2014 at 10:11pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was ordering a pizza over the phone. When the guy asked for my order, I yelled "Hey, you guys wanted pepperoni, right?" In reality, I was yelling this to my cat. College hasn't made me many friends so far. FML

#21095295
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38958) - you deserved it (7440)

On 03/24/2014 at 4:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my husband actually tried to pay me to forget about the affair that he's been having. FML

#21092678
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42266) - you deserved it (3438)

On 03/21/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames)

Today, a tiny worm was wriggling across the screen of my Mac laptop. I tried to wipe it away with my thumb, but it just kept crawling. Turns out the worm lives *inside* my screen, beneath the glass. FML

#21092367
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39931) - you deserved it (3758)

On 03/21/2014 at 1:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML

#21092226
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40448) - you deserved it (2686)

On 03/20/2014 at 11:04pm - misc - by nehadrihan - United States (California)

Today, on my way to Burger King I got into a heated discussion with my wife about our cats. We have 15 rescues, and I've reached my limit. Guess what came running up to my car while waiting in the drive-through. We named him Pickles. FML

#21091449
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41172) - you deserved it (8654)

On 03/20/2014 at 12:31am - animals - by cat whisperer - United States

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

#21087156
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43797) - you deserved it (7886)

On 03/15/2014 at 8:21am - kids - by emergencyroom (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had the cops called on me for acting suspiciously. I was using a payphone. FML

#21086220
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38337) - you deserved it (3236)

On 03/14/2014 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, at a staff meeting, our boss sighed and asked why I'm always in the meetings instead of my co-worker. I reminded him that it's because I'm the department supervisor, not my co-worker. He wouldn't believe me until he saw it for himself in our personnel files. FML

#21084802
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35761) - you deserved it (3075)

On 03/12/2014 at 12:02pm - work - by KBBL (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44424) - you deserved it (6061)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom



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