About solarrunner : Tooo lazy to write, that...
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You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I put 7 kisses at the end of a text instead of 10. She said that our relationship was bound to fail if "I can't remember important things like that". FML
I agree, your life sucks (37955) - you deserved it (4244)
On 07/23/2011 at 7:00am - love - by Baconcook3000 (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, the gift my mother had mailed me for my birthday finally arrived. It was a gift card for Starbucks. A gift card that had already been redeemed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22692) - you deserved it (1422)
On 07/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by coffee girl (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31135) - you deserved it (8763)
On 07/22/2011 at 9:38am - intimacy - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom
Today, I asked the girl I like to send me 'yummy pictures.' I got a picture of cheesecake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8457) - you deserved it (71704)
On 07/22/2011 at 2:29am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31051) - you deserved it (8236)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12156) - you deserved it (31196)
On 07/20/2011 at 8:36am - misc - by ElixirRose - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32623) - you deserved it (4782)
On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32623) - you deserved it (4782)
On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I got a call from a man yelling and cursing at me, calling me a "selfish no-life asshole" for getting his "baby girl" pregnant. I'm 29 and she is 27 and we have been married for 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40218) - you deserved it (2054)
On 07/20/2011 at 3:40am - kids - by Harry - United States
Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29462) - you deserved it (3987)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States
Today, I told my boyfriend to stop tickling me, since I absolutely hate being tickled. He got extremely pissed at me and left the room. It took me a full five minutes to realize that I'd called him by my ex's name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10345) - you deserved it (61816)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:07am - love - by sarahbeth93 - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I was riding on the bus, when I felt a weird sensation on my hair. The person behind me was petting it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24431) - you deserved it (1967)
On 07/19/2011 at 9:29pm - misc - by imnotacat (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7373) - you deserved it (49806)
On 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm - misc - by freakfreak12345 - United States (Maine)
Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21944) - you deserved it (4561)
On 07/19/2011 at 11:19am - work - by Bill Harrison - United States
Today, after being in love with one of my best friends for ages, he took me on a date. We then went back to his place and we made love. Afterwards, he told me he wanted to show me something and led me outside. He ran back in and locked the door. It's a two hour walk home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44841) - you deserved it (4970)
On 07/19/2011 at 7:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Monday 20 May 2013
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