solarrunner

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Offline (the 04/21/2014 at 2:20pm)

solarrunner

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 March 1983 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5482
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About solarrunner : Tooo lazy to write, that...

solarrunner's page activity

Visits<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 8:41pm<b>Jkalia</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:58pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 12:43am<b>Timmy_Boy</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 10:32pm<b>cummeariver</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 3:43pm<b>seetei</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 12:25am<b>CinematicKid</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 12:32am<b>Oihana</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 1:55pm<b>swasher</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 9:52pm<b>swetha590</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 10:24am<b>tigcat625</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 3:07pm<b>valipali</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 6:42am<b>carla6991</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 6:32am<b>sardonique</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 2:26pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 11:33am<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 11:37pm<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 2:14pm<b>LokaS</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 7:26am

solarrunner's FML badges

Perfectionist

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

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Socialite

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solarrunner's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take care of my best friend while she was drunk. This meant changing her pee-soaked sheets, making her take a bath to get all the baby powder off, and making her put clothes on as she tried to run out the house naked. FML

by anonymous / 05/21/2011 at 3:20am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my husband, of only a year, why we don't have sex anymore. He said it's because he masturbates. When I asked how often he did it, he replied "Every day that we don't have sex..." FML

by btswc / 05/21/2011 at 3:18am / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I called my mom and I got voicemail: "Hello, this is Joyce. I'm not here at the moment, so leave a message and I will call back as soon as possible. Except if it's Sophie. If it is, get the hell out of my life, biiitch." I'm Sophie. FML

by thatsasquee / 05/21/2011 at 2:42am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Utah) / Transportation

Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boss scheduled a staff breakfast at a swanky new restaurant for all the hard work we've been doing. The dining area is on the roof, and the building has no elevator. I've been in a wheelchair for 11 years. When I brought this to my boss's attention, he said it wasn't his problem. FML

by jayc80 / 05/20/2011 at 1:59pm / Bermuda (Hamilton) / Work

Today, I got motion sickness while having sex. FML

by mikeycoco / 05/20/2011 at 10:39am / Intimacy

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

by Max Flynn / 05/20/2011 at 6:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel like a child molester. FML

by skiittlez713 / 05/20/2011 at 4:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me. Ten minutes after, he called me asking how to change his relationship status on facebook. FML

by BALEIGHLOVE17 / 05/20/2011 at 1:46am / Love

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up in a panic to what sounded like a plane about to crash into my house. I was so scared, I peed myself and passed out. It was just my cell phone vibrating under my pillow. FML

by esoog / 05/19/2011 at 1:38pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

by 613tanner / 05/19/2011 at 1:30am / Transportation

Today, I offered to drive my girlfriend's grandpa to the doctor. I thus learned my girlfriend's grandfather has a colostomy bag when it burst all over the inside of my truck. FML

by John / 05/19/2011 at 12:27am / Transportation

Today, I came home to my front door open and a homeless man taking a 'bath' in my sink. If this wasn't bad enough, he refused to leave because 'finders keepers!' FML

by Ally / 05/18/2011 at 9:07pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous