About solarrunner : Tooo lazy to write, that...
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You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57538) - you deserved it (3535)
On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 7 years with another woman. He panicked and blamed it on the "long distance" and how we "never see each other". We've lived in the same neighbourhood since we were 5 years old, and we've lived together for the past four years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55260) - you deserved it (3228)
On 05/08/2013 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by lalalaisling - Ireland (Cork)
Today, I found out that every time my girlfriend takes a big dump, she pretends as if she's giving birth and screams uncontrollably. I just moved in with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43165) - you deserved it (4417)
On 05/03/2013 at 7:32am - health - by poopydaddy - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML
I agree, your life sucks (53462) - you deserved it (7619)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53598) - you deserved it (5671)
On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19857) - you deserved it (42765)
On 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my parents finally got married. At the after-party, my mother got drunk and informed me that even though she and my father were now married, it doesn't change the fact that I'm still a bastard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36769) - you deserved it (2453)
On 04/29/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by SierraCheyenne (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47373) - you deserved it (2970)
On 04/24/2013 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by awkward O_o - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44789) - you deserved it (18158)
On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - kids - by BIGCHEIFAAA (man) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to be playful and leave my girlfriend flowers and chocolates from an "Anonymous Admirer". She immediately dumped me, saying she couldn't be with someone who "isn't even as romantic as a stranger". Yep, I think I just got dumped for myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48751) - you deserved it (6600)
On 04/23/2013 at 7:22pm - love - by BestBF - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38699) - you deserved it (16898)
On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14044) - you deserved it (1835)
On 10/26/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I got more happy birthday wishes on my porn account than my Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8640) - you deserved it (17966)
On 03/27/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by MattBC97 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got more happy birthday wishes on my porn account than my Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8640) - you deserved it (17966)
On 03/27/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by MattBC97 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32455) - you deserved it (7238)
On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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