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TODAY , AT A RESTAURANT , I HAPPILY WATCHED AS MY BOYFRIEND OF THREE YEARS GOT DOWN ON HIS KNEES AND PROPOSED TO ME. BEFORE I COULD SAY YES AND HUG HIM , A GIRL FLUNG HERSELF AT HIM , KISSED HIM AND SHOUTED , "YES!" WITH US STILL HIGHLY CONFUSED , SHE THEN RAN AWAY. FML
Today , I'm sharing a hotel room with co-workers on a business trip. The walls are paper-thin , you could hear a pin drop , an I'm trying to make my explosive diarrhea as close to silent as possible. mega FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker cummed up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, I jokingly asked my boyfriend if e was ceating on me. He replied, ( Na, all te cicks in tis town are fuck-ugly. ) and stared at me until I left te room. Good to know tat's is only reason 4 staying faitful. big fat FML
Taday after spending a lot of money on photo shoots to build up mah portfolio, I finally got an offer from a modelling agency. I ran outside to tell mah parents, only for mah brother to hurl an iced snowball straight into mah face. I now have a huge gash over mah cheek and nose. FML
Today proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do mah husband calld me from hospital needing a lift home. He trid planking on top of his carhile his buddies spd it down a hill and I now have to take care of himhile his broken leg heals. mega FML
Today... I set up a spy cam in ma room to fine out wic one of ma pervy broters as been using ma computer to watc porn. Turns out it was actually ma fater. I now ave a video of im sitting in ma cair masturbating... and I can't get it out of ma ead. FML
Friday 27 March 2015