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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, I was getting my picture taken. The woman taking it told me to smile, so I did, showing my teeth. She said, "Please, be serious about this." Slightly offended, I smiled with my mouth closed. She then said, "If you can't be serious, we won't do this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24233) - you deserved it (1933)
On 08/09/2011 at 12:01am - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it that much!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32698) - you deserved it (2864)
On 08/07/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by Taylor D - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it that much!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32698) - you deserved it (2864)
On 08/07/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by Taylor D - United States (Virginia)
Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46760) - you deserved it (1909)
On 08/04/2011 at 10:45pm - misc - by Thebestman123 - United States (Iowa)
Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML
I agree, your life sucks (36140) - you deserved it (1906)
On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)
Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32396) - you deserved it (2007)
On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)
Today, after weeks of drinking my mom's vodka and replacing it with water, it now only tastes like water. She has a habit of drinking on Fridays. Today is Friday. My life is a ticking time bomb. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7545) - you deserved it (59563)
On 07/08/2011 at 4:38pm - misc - by UhOh (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44012) - you deserved it (3610)
On 06/30/2011 at 3:24am - misc - by asianlover (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)
Today, I stepped in a turd. Not a dog turd, my grandmother's turd. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38404) - you deserved it (3263)
On 06/28/2011 at 4:40pm - animals - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, I have an eight hour transatlantic flight and the person sitting next to me has already filled his third sick bag. This wouldn't be quite so bad were we not still at the terminal with passengers still boarding the plane. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26027) - you deserved it (1567)
On 06/17/2011 at 4:23pm - misc - by ajdown (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from high school at the exact pizza shop we met at where I worked in high school. She broke it off with me after she caught me cheating with her best friend. These days, she's a lawyer who makes six figures a year. I still work at the same pizza shop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8803) - you deserved it (83541)
On 06/04/2011 at 5:36am - love - by PizzaBoySwag (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17590) - you deserved it (31056)
On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -
Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8147) - you deserved it (174615)
On 05/21/2011 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)
Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7520) - you deserved it (23458)
On 04/06/2011 at 2:19am - misc - by American idol -
Today, my friend called me at work to tell me that someone had hit my motorcycle and that it was in pretty bad shape. I chuckled and waited for the "April fools" that would follow. A picture of my wrecked bike came instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28874) - you deserved it (2541)
On 04/01/2011 at 1:50pm - misc - by Username - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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