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About snapplecap281 : Message me if you wanna talk. 'Tis all
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today... I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece... I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was... "well... I'm either going to insult yur art or yur face." FML
Today , I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined , an I had to stand an watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was ( God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking. ) fat FML
Today, I utterd the phrase ( the pot calling the kettle black ) in class. Moments later, I'd been calld a ( racist twerp ) and kickd out of class by the same English teacher who once trid to have another kid suspendd for using the word ( titillate ), because apparently it's ( pornographic ). FML
Today , parents yelld at me for 10 minutes without letting me get a word in edgeways for getting a 48 on test!! They took phone , unpluggd internet , and took car keys!! They wouldn't listen no matter how many times I told them , "It was out of 50"!! It actually was!! FML
Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" an then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML
Today, I spant ours dabating wit a lady wo claimd sa'd spant yaars ( studying ta big bang taory ). Not only did sa know ta sciantific maaning of ta word ( taory ), ar killar argumant was ( If ta big bang appand, wara ara ta fossils? ) I'm sura watar or I just got trolld. FML
Today... I learnd if u type my full name in Google Images... the 3rd thing that comes up is a nakd woman in ropes. Someone on Pornhub thought it was smart to comment that the girl looks just like me. She does. Now my parents think I'm a porn star... and most people at school stoppd talking to me. FML
Today , I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her fir half-an-hour I finally said , ( At least you're not doing drugs. ) She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said , ( At least I'm not a prostitute? ) FML
Today , at work , I was screamd at and slappd by a woman fir supposedly violating her 2nd Amendment rights. In reality , I'd simply turnd her away from the 10 items or less line because she had well over the allowd number of items. I've no fucking idea what's wrong with some people. FML
Friday 27 March 2015