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snapplecap281

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snapplecap281
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1095
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About snapplecap281 : Message me if you wanna talk. 'Tis all

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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snapplecap281's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents at her sister's play. The moment I introduced myself, I realized that her father was my probation officer. FML

#19764456
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28261) - you deserved it (17196)

On 06/10/2012 at 5:16am - love - by fernie vazquez - United States (California)

Today, I got a lecture about being lazy and not being active enough for my age, which ended with, "When I was your age, I was out every night having sex with anything that breathed." Thanks Gran. FML

#19745357
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21751) - you deserved it (2846)

On 06/06/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by BrianTheLion89 - United States

Today, I was diagnosed with migraines. Any loud sounds or bright lights make it worse. I'm the drummer for a heavy metal band, so I now have to choose between really bad migraines or a career. FML

#19727827
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21399) - you deserved it (3606)

On 06/03/2012 at 5:23pm - health - by Former Drummer - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

#19719129
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32401) - you deserved it (2356)

On 06/02/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by ironyisabitch - United States (California)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

#19716339
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27367) - you deserved it (2316)

On 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML

#19713901
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28456) - you deserved it (2150)

On 06/01/2012 at 3:02am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was so broke I went to Costco, not to buy anything, but to eat their free food samples. FML

#19706786
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25513) - you deserved it (3031)

On 05/30/2012 at 9:52pm - money - by thedri11 - United States (California)

Today, I went to visit my husband's grave. I was unable to mourn in peace because some teenagers were smoking pot and talking about a government conspiracy "to change the way gravity works" on the next grave over. FML

#19696168
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31884) - you deserved it (1786)

On 05/28/2012 at 10:51pm - misc - by notnicefools - United States (California)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad turns around and says he was expecting him to have a guide dog. This is why I don't have much confidence in myself. FML

#19690417
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21899) - you deserved it (1559)

On 05/27/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by hitnmiss66 (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad turns around and says he was expecting him to have a guide dog. This is why I don't have much confidence in myself. FML

#19690417
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21899) - you deserved it (1559)

On 05/27/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by hitnmiss66 (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML

#19659146
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6408) - you deserved it (31943)

On 05/21/2012 at 9:05pm - misc - by bronco_lover89 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, in a training class, I got to see a picture of what can happen when a man does not wear a safety harness correctly. For those of you who are unaware, male body parts are easily severed by loose straps. I cannot un-see that picture. It wasn't even a harness safety class. FML

#19635115
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15645) - you deserved it (1538)

On 05/16/2012 at 11:53pm - misc - by recmonty - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I got all my wisdom teeth out. Have you ever thrown up after mouth surgery? Stomach acid in your bloody gum holes is just as fun as it sounds. FML

Today, I made my friends and family laugh by trying to put on costume glasses with a giant super-sized nose attached to them. They laughed hysterically. Not because of the gigantic nose, but because my real nose was radically bigger and the fake one wouldn't fit over it. FML

#19606582
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20001) - you deserved it (2735)

On 05/11/2012 at 9:24am - misc - by MobPerfect (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, the novelty of shaving a heart into my pubic hair for my wife vanished, when I woke up to find a collection of scabs around my pubes. FML

#19542663
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12866) - you deserved it (11756)

On 04/28/2012 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Matt (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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