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snapplecap281

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snapplecap281

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1658
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About snapplecap281 : Message me if you wanna talk. 'Tis all

snapplecap281's page activity

Visits<b>MissEris</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:41am<b>jeremycruz</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 12:07am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:09pm<b>depressed_child</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 3:17pm<b>Jenra</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 10:39am<b>poncho55</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 10:44pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 1:42pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 12:04am<b>Bukowskiwasanass</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 6:06pm<b>SwimmingBassist</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 1:42am<b>sybyabraham</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 7:43pm<b>Gavyng123</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 8:20am<b>Zazoo1995</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 11:37am<b>adameeo</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 12:09pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 3:21am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 8:23am<b>andiewithlove</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 12:32am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 10:38pm

Liked!<b>ExastirisDragon</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 9:44am

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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snapplecap281's favorite FMLs

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80176) - you deserved it (24600)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48977) - you deserved it (10225)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I hid my weed stash in a bag from an expensive jewellery store. My sister walked into my room, went "Ooh, what's this?" and grabbed the bag. I grabbed it back and ad-libbed that it was her Christmas gift. Now I actually have to buy her expensive jewellery. FML

#20405613
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10903) - you deserved it (57711)

On 12/18/2012 at 1:28pm - misc - by junkie (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

#20398504
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26483) - you deserved it (4930) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France

Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML

#20202076
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24454) - you deserved it (2066)

On 12/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML

#20201491
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39644) - you deserved it (2436)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML

#20199046
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11270) - you deserved it (38182)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25124) - you deserved it (5777)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, I sent in an assignment from my batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem, analyze it, and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML

Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML

#20193830
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5110) - you deserved it (73677)

On 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm - misc - by mom (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15124) - you deserved it (49376)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML

#20188746
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23125) - you deserved it (2346)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26822) - you deserved it (2921)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27519) - you deserved it (1548)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML

#20174308
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31897) - you deserved it (8112)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by Janitoro (man) - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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