Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

smilepatrol

Search for a member

smilepatrol

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 September 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 656
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About smilepatrol : One of the sleepiest people in the city that never sleeps! Oops.

smilepatrol's page activity

Visits<b>LCwisco</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 12:07am<b>f36k</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 2:55am<b>Viscouz</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 3:59pm<b>spamhands1</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 2:56am<b>tim_narnimee</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:46am<b>chrisstachon</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 5:41pm<b>abattior</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 4:37pm<b>jerseychickityy</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:35pm<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 2:57am<b>Phaeno</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 5:57pm<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 2:14pm<b>Clutz97</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 8:49am<b>s3kShUn47</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:03pm<b>farleytb42</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:49am<b>marleybree</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 2:19am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 4:41am<b>wotfukm8</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:06am<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 11:02am

smilepatrol's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of smilepatrol's badges

smilepatrol's favorite FMLs

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58554) - you deserved it (6894)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79523) - you deserved it (7238)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my wife brought my 5-year-old daughter to visit me at the office. My boss has a speech impediment, and when she heard it, she exclaimed, "Hey my daddy can sound just like you! Show him daddy! Show him!" FML

#20454855
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19271) - you deserved it (39227)

On 01/12/2013 at 3:14am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

#19853920
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35267) - you deserved it (3040)

On 06/27/2012 at 1:05am - love - by tammy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

#18671217
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46825) - you deserved it (3239)

On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: