Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

slick5880

Search for a member

slick5880
  • Town/Country : Kenova, WV
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1922
  • Number of comments : 204
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About slick5880 : Unlimited potential with zero initiative.

slick5880's last visitors

thelittlemissymario2012lunarahcasafudgeMaximumBeatsarah1024m22100xAwkwardTurtle

slick5880's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of slick5880's badges

slick5880's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor put up an electric fence to keep my five-year-old son out. FML

#20980679
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34106) - you deserved it (10958)

On 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm - kids - by Awkward - United States (Washington)

Today, my grandmother opened the bathroom door to find me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convinced that I was eating my own shit and will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML

#20882660
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25668) - you deserved it (37578)

On 09/15/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to my high school reunion. Someone walked up to me and said, "Wow, you look so different!" She then followed it up with, "You used to be so pretty, what happened?" FML

#20849795
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36357) - you deserved it (2632)

On 08/22/2013 at 7:40pm - misc - by Ugly (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40213) - you deserved it (4657)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

#20826932
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54399) - you deserved it (15245)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Latvia (Jelgavas)

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

#20793994
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52488) - you deserved it (6065)

On 07/20/2013 at 11:45am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I told my dad I'm pregnant. His response? "It's only a phase, you'll get over it." FML

#20592767
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51042) - you deserved it (9912)

On 04/15/2013 at 2:04am - intimacy - by twinArmageddon2 - United States (California)

Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML

#20544337
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41088) - you deserved it (2031)

On 03/15/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by guy - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

#20529387
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41600) - you deserved it (6437)

On 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm - misc - by parental failure (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML

#20479024
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32020) - you deserved it (2025)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Sarah - United States

Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML

#20474800
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28629) - you deserved it (4930)

On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

#20472782
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28528) - you deserved it (4733)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

#20470936
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42446) - you deserved it (3654)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML

#20190054
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16582) - you deserved it (1259)

On 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by reedcarter -

Today, while at a stop light, I was rear-ended by a car behind me. The guy got angry at me, because according to him, I should've known that his car has poor braking distance, and so I should've moved forward a few more feet to compensate. FML

#20157954
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23015) - you deserved it (1134)

On 11/10/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Me - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: