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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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skootergirl2010

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skootergirl2010
  • Town/Country : FUCK YOU, TX, U.S.
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 350
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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skootergirl2010's favorite FMLs

Today, at a restaurant, I was joking around trying to make my friend laugh by pretending to be a ninja. I did this by putting my napkin in front of my face. I happened to look over at another table and saw that a lady wearing a burqa was giving me the most evil glare I have ever seen in my life. FML

#12768878 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (16993) - you deserved it (13260)

On 08/27/2010 at 5:46am - misc - by CrushAdrenaline - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I paid for my shopping at a self paying checkout. I had a lot of shopping and there was a big line. When I scanned my last item, the machine read out, "EXTRA SMALL LUBRICATED DUREX CONDOMS." FML

#12679299 (227)

I agree, your life sucks (25267) - you deserved it (16098)

On 08/22/2010 at 5:37am - intimacy - by YogiBear - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML

#8711589 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (4311) - you deserved it (13803)

On 02/28/2010 at 4:12am - misc - by combo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML

#8706906 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (6425) - you deserved it (19066)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at my volleyball tournament I was extremely pumped to start playing so I went to take my sweats off and everybody began to stare at me then I looked down to come to realize I had no spandex on, just a thong. FML

#8698914 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (5825) - you deserved it (17230)

On 02/27/2010 at 8:11pm - misc - by volleyballgirl - United States

Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML

#8612395 (228)

I agree, your life sucks (15496) - you deserved it (2730)

On 02/24/2010 at 10:06am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, before my date came to pick me up, I put tissues under my arms so I wouldn't leave wet marks. I forgot to remove them, and when we got physical, they fell out, looking like I'd stuffed my bra. FML

#8606978 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (7681) - you deserved it (19783)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:54am - intimacy - by kiki (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while working, I was flirting with this cute girl I was ringing up. When I asked her if she had her store card she said "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?". I said "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?". She said "No." I didn't know I could punch in her card with just the number. FML

#5929779 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (7204) - you deserved it (21622)

On 10/21/2009 at 3:53pm - love - by fyourlife (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML

#5927953 (90)

I agree, your life sucks (24665) - you deserved it (4885)

On 10/21/2009 at 12:40pm - health - by Rayvyn (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I told my girlfriend over MSN that we had to talk. I log on to facebook and the first thing I see is that she changed our relationship from "In a Relationship" to "It's Complicated." FML

#5923458 (75)

I agree, your life sucks (18559) - you deserved it (7943)

On 10/21/2009 at 12:07am - love - by wtfrelationship (man) - Singapore

Today, while in class, a cute boy came up and asked me for my number. I giggled and wrote my phone number on a piece of paper and told him to call me sometime. He gave me a weird look and walked away. He was asking which number math problem I needed help with. FML

#5896023 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (7966) - you deserved it (20170)

On 10/19/2009 at 1:43pm - misc - by loser (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I started my first day at work, I've been unemployed for a while and am in college, so naturally I have no money. At the end of my shift, I ask what we do with the extra bread, and they tell me to throw it away. Being poor and hungry, I decide to take the bread home. I got fired for stealing. FML

#5892629 (197)

I agree, your life sucks (33911) - you deserved it (6168)

On 10/19/2009 at 4:46am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I spilled a half bottle of superglue on my hands. I also found out that cold water only makes it harden faster. FML

#5878070 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (20661) - you deserved it (9817)

On 10/18/2009 at 12:38pm - misc - by Xia (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was driving my little sister to school. She really didn't wanna go and was throwing a tantrum in the car. When we stopped at a red light, my sister notices a police man giving a ticket to another driver. She rolled down her window and screamed "Help me! I'm being kidnapped by a murderer!" FML

#4644829 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (52705) - you deserved it (1910)

On 08/19/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Amara1717 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it he said "I don't know what you're talking about Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (737641) - you deserved it (60975)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)