skitzoklown

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Offline (the 05/05/2015 at 5:17am)

skitzoklown

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 535
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About skitzoklown : \m/ Metal!!!! \m/

skitzoklown's page activity

Visits<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 7:23pm<b>furstur</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 12:13pm<b>juststephhere</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 11:14pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 2:28pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 2:38am<b>leahb99</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 10:55am<b>hannahsophia</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 10:00pm<b>botanistjessica</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 6:00pm<b>EvilPandaxD</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 3:49pm<b>CaptainCuddles21</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 11:10am<b>kansah</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 7:46am<b>wisesombrero</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 5:54am<b>iamatoadkisser</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 12:21am<b>Mc2013</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:58pm<b>RocketmanWelbz</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:14pm<b>euphoricness</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 10:00am<b>marulicko</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 5:16pm<b>jb590</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 2:38pm

skitzoklown's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of skitzoklown's badges

skitzoklown's favorite FMLs

Today, my prom dress came in the mail. I don't know what happened with the tailoring but not only does it not fit, but it also looks like deli meat. FML

by Deli meat prom / 04/20/2015 at 5:41pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spontaneously got my ear pierced. By spontaneously, I mean my 12-year-old sister stabbed one of her earrings into my ear while I was sleeping. She claimed the freckle on my earlobe looks "exactly the same" as the hole from her ear piercing. FML

by ouch / 07/24/2013 at 2:03pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2013 at 12:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

by needsnewshorts / 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my 11-year-old daughter heard the quote, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." She decided to test this out by letting our new puppy out of the front door. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2013 at 8:10pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I knocked over a display case at a mall, shattering hundreds of dollars in goods. Embarrassed, I tried to scurry out of the nearest door without being seen. I scuttled right into the janitor's closet, the door automatically locking behind me. I waited for an hour to be let out. FML

by Jer / 07/15/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Kentucky) / Money

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

by possiblyoverweight / 11/08/2011 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, my looks alone made a girl cry. FML

by SadFace / 03/07/2010 at 1:54pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I did my workout at the gym instead of at home as I usually do, since I'm paranoid about people seeing up my shorts. I told myself to get over it, because it's impossible. After my extensive workout, I realized that there was a hole in the crotch of my shorts. FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2010 at 1:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was leaving the train station when a man came up to me and asked me if I have an unlimited metrocard to swipe him in. I did have an unlimited card so I told him sure. While taking out my metrocard from my wallet, he grabbed my wallet and ran away as fast as he could. FML

by HunniBeeHuni / 11/17/2009 at 12:25am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML

by Timmah / 08/31/2009 at 1:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was on a date with a guy, we were sitting in a restaurant having a fairly good conversation, when I had to go to the washroom. I left the table and when I came back, he was gone. Along with my wallet and car keys. FML

by LifeFucksUsAll / 08/19/2009 at 3:44pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML

by meantowheels / 06/20/2009 at 10:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking through town when I saw a plastic bag on the ground. Trying to be a good citizen, I picked it up, intending on throwing it in the trash. When I looked up, there wasn't a trash can for another hundred feet. So I put it back down. Now I've got a $200 fine to pay for littering. FML

by fml / 04/24/2009 at 9:55pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous