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sj_sharks

Offline (the 08/12/2015 at 8:42pm) | Search for a member

sj_sharks

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1049
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sj_sharks's page activity

Visits<b>TheCanucklehead</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 2:16pm

sj_sharks's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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sj_sharks's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML

#20130407
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26134) - you deserved it (2854)

On 10/23/2012 at 9:19pm - love - by SFra - United States

Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML

#20129296
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10959) - you deserved it (55651)

On 10/23/2012 at 12:25am - kids - by Bratty son (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32941) - you deserved it (4901)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, on the first cold night of autumn, I realized I need a girlfriend because the only way I can stay warm is if I spoon with my dog. FML

#20127903
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17787) - you deserved it (4547)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by sadguyme (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
520 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80492) - you deserved it (9409)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was sitting in the park with my new dog; I got her from the pound last week. We were enjoying the sun when I noticed that every time a black person walked past, she'd bark like crazy. Great, my dog is a racist. FML

#20097984
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28033) - you deserved it (2922)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:10am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML

#20087243
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16936) - you deserved it (31413)

On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

#20081762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24456) - you deserved it (13239)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was excited to get my first writing assignment since starting law school. I found out that I have to write a paper defending free speech. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have to defend the Westboro Baptist Church and if I weren't a former Marine. FML

#20079105
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30920) - you deserved it (3178)

On 09/19/2012 at 10:54am - misc - by LawStudent (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML

#20075207
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31788) - you deserved it (4153)

On 09/16/2012 at 8:50pm - love - by painfetish8021 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, in the middle of what had to be the most amazing blowjob I've ever had in my life, my girlfriend had a mental breakdown and began weeping on top of my cock. FML

#20070700
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32254) - you deserved it (7675)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by blueballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered a large and somewhat disturbing whitehead inside my ear crevice. Apparently it's been there for a while, because everyone at work has nicknamed it Hugo. FML

#20063555
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21420) - you deserved it (2798)

On 09/08/2012 at 6:39pm - work - by me - United States

Today, my teacher assigned us teams in a class debate. I landed on the team that had to argue the obviously wrong point of view. When I finished, my teacher told me and the entire class how much I disturbed her, and how I reminded her of Hitler and Napoleon. FML

#20058797
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26460) - you deserved it (2248)

On 09/05/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cotton swab shoved up my cock's piss-pipe. FML

#20057281
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27011) - you deserved it (8815)

On 09/04/2012 at 11:09am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a girl told me she stopped eating cherries ever since her father choked on one when she was a kid. She later mentioned that she doesn't like to drive. I sarcastically asked, "Did your dad choke on a car too?" Nope, her two brothers died in a car accident. FML

#20056763
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9499) - you deserved it (54926)

On 09/04/2012 at 12:24am - misc - by Cherrish it - United States (California)



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