This member hasn't filled in the description.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23478) - you deserved it (4933)
On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia
Today, the company I was fired from three years ago merged with the company I work at now. The new owners' first order of business was to fire me again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35992) - you deserved it (1823) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 02/15/2013 at 8:37pm - work - by Nico - Sent from mobile version
Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30063) - you deserved it (2191)
On 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm - misc - by Experience (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, after heavy rain my street flooded. While in my living room, I looked outside to see that my elderly neighbour was outside splashing in a knee deep puddle. He was butt-naked and wearing a snorkel and flippers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22265) - you deserved it (2188)
On 02/04/2013 at 4:15am - misc - by Stunned (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37378) - you deserved it (4145) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version
Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29287) - you deserved it (4984)
On 01/27/2013 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33692) - you deserved it (6050)
On 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm - intimacy - by itsrathersmall (woman) - United States (North Dakota)
Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44659) - you deserved it (7276)
On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers and "do it like deer". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25730) - you deserved it (4878)
On 12/23/2012 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Kasey Eames - United States (California)
Today, my bra clasp broke in the middle of a job interview. I got the job on the spot. I'm scared to report into work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24239) - you deserved it (2849)
On 12/19/2012 at 5:06pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27585) - you deserved it (3157)
On 12/19/2012 at 9:59am - kids - by spellbound - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was at my job as a cashier when a man called me his "Grocery Slave." I was almost offended, but then I thought about my salary. I am a Grocery Slave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25310) - you deserved it (2541)
On 12/19/2012 at 12:17am - work - by ehrmagahd (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12087) - you deserved it (17434)
On 12/18/2012 at 2:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was slapped across the face by a girl in the waiting room at the dentist's office. She thought I was taking a picture of her breasts with my phone. I was smiling while reading other people's FMLs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31165) - you deserved it (2170)
On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)
Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16556) - you deserved it (1148)
On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
