silentshadow90

Search for a member

Offline (the 09/04/2016 at 8:45pm)

silentshadow90

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 July 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3276
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

silentshadow90's page activity

Visits<b>KarSkittle</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 4:17pm<b>smartsamsam</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 4:22am<b>pred8885</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 9:35am<b>arielg</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 3:06am<b>reallynow1910</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 5:27pm<b>Alexeon</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 11:51pm<b>websphere69</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 10:43pm<b>pbnjrox</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 9:34pm<b>Kar0</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 6:52am<b>jordynsage</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 5:47pm<b>JD1147</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 8:06pm<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 7:14pm<b>jizzwold</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 6:16pm<b>lee009_10</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 12:37am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 2:49pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 7:50pm<b>turiro</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 5:30pm

silentshadow90's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of silentshadow90's badges

silentshadow90's favorite FMLs

Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML

by [...] / 12/12/2013 at 9:28am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Kids

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 6:56am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

by OuchImAMoron / 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I logged onto Facebook to see one of my "friends" had used my account to post a coming-out story. It had comments on it such as "I knew it!" "Finally." and "That explains so much." FML

by Thanks guys / 11/26/2013 at 12:21am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while driving home, I looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that my three-year-old daughter had managed to get out of her seat and had crawled to the back window. I pulled over and strapped her in again. Five minutes later she was back at the window. FML

by houdinette / 11/22/2013 at 6:14pm / Sweden (Ostergotlands Lan) / Kids

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

by TheTruthofWomen / 11/04/2013 at 12:45am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

by PapaW / 11/01/2013 at 3:01am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, my mom let me stay home from school, because I was sick. We both agreed not to tell my dad, since he's adamant that I never miss even one day of school. A few hours after my mom left for work, he came back home, with another woman. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 12:26pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I let a friend cut my hair. I soon went from having a 'fro to looking like I lost a fight with a lawn mower. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2013 at 12:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was maced. Not by a person, but rather by one of those automatic air fresheners in the bathroom. It was conveniently placed at eye level, you know, for freshness. FML

by erockinthesuburb / 10/15/2013 at 8:38pm / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2013 at 3:13am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, some ass-bandit broke into my house by smashing a window, just so he could steal the ancient VHS cassette player that my wife wouldn't let me throw away. Thanks, scumbag, but the front door was unlocked. FML

by and she blames me -_- / 10/13/2013 at 5:50pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, my mom made fun of me because I'm 16 and have never had a boyfriend, then bragged that at my age she was already pregnant with me. FML

by roundtherose / 10/12/2013 at 9:59pm / United States (Alaska) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

by Agax / 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous