shmuh

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shmuh

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 October 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1632
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About shmuh : I like video games and stuff.

shmuh's page activity

Visits<b>grogers311</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 11:21am<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 8:20pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:34pm<b>ha</b> - the 04/09/2010 at 7:35pm<b>ChilledOut</b> - the 03/21/2010 at 12:04am<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 12/20/2009 at 1:52am<b>imaeatyourllama</b> - the 12/15/2009 at 9:31pm<b>xfmylifexxx</b> - the 11/22/2009 at 12:59am<b>allmidnighteyes</b> - the 11/11/2009 at 2:23pm<b>nodbor</b> - the 11/08/2009 at 3:10am<b>warrreagle0101</b> - the 10/09/2009 at 6:42am<b>doubleAbattery</b> - the 10/03/2009 at 9:41pm<b>bhahahalldaylong</b> - the 09/30/2009 at 8:44am<b>22jrdn55</b> - the 09/22/2009 at 3:45am<b>type1</b> - the 09/20/2009 at 11:24am<b>Witchcraft</b> - the 09/14/2009 at 9:44pm<b>DuhthatsObvious</b> - the 09/06/2009 at 12:52pm<b>DoveOrHawk</b> - the 09/05/2009 at 4:46pm

shmuh's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

shmuh's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed "holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML

by becca1417 / 09/01/2009 at 6:21pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a stressful day at work and decided to go in the jacuzzi. I hadn't used it for a year, so it was a little dirty. After I cleaned it, filled it up, and jumped in, I pressed the jets. Immediately, thousands of dead moths shot out at full speed towards me. FML

by mel / 08/30/2009 at 11:23am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

by ShiriSarah / 08/20/2009 at 10:39am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2009 at 9:23am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there, to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride: 1 - Getting Laid: 0. FML

by razgriz1 / 08/20/2009 at 1:45am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML

by JPF / 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I finally told my mom I am a lesbian. She started laughing and said 'Good one honey'. I told her I wasn't joking, and she took my face in her hands and said 'You ARE joking!' Then she left. FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2009 at 12:44am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy

Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML

by Lilly_28 / 08/11/2009 at 10:01am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was alone with a work acquaintance at lunch. A noise came from his pocket; he whipped out his iPod Touch and said "Sorry, I have to take this," before walking away with the iPod to his ear. Not only did he not want to talk to me, he thought I was stupid enough to confuse an iPod with a phone. FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2009 at 8:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

by klutz / 08/10/2009 at 10:34am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

by theregoesmyspermcount / 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I found out that my husband made a replica of our family on The Sims 3. I also found out he killed me off a couple weeks ago and made a new wife, KiKi. FML

by nosrepamai82 / 07/26/2009 at 12:28am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told my roommate about a trick he had used by filling nail holes with toothpaste when he moved out. When I came home with putty to fill the holes, there were blue spots all over the walls. She had filled them with blue gel toothpaste. Now I get to repaint, too. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2009 at 6:14pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a flight and one of my friends was sitting next to this woman who happened to be sleeping with her mouth wide open. My friend decided to take a picture. While I was editing it, a man sitting behind us said "If you want to take a picture of my girlfriend, wait until she's awake". FML

by SexyPlayer9 / 07/24/2009 at 1:23am / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

by Ella / 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Love