shessomepirate

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shessomepirate

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2639
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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shessomepirate's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:53am

shessomepirate's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

shessomepirate's favorite FMLs

Today, while copying some stuff for school, I felt someone rubbing her boobs against my back. I got a boner and when I looked to see who the hot chick was, I saw my fat friend rubbing his man boobs against my back. FML

by florisvanlent / 02/12/2009 at 11:17am / Netherlands (Drenthe) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my teacher writes descriptions next to people's names on the register to remind him who people were. By mistake the descriptions appeared on the computer projector. Next to my name it said "Tubby". FML

by atterz123 / 02/12/2009 at 8:37am / United Kingdom (Lincolnshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, when I tried on a pair of pants at the mall, I asked the salesperson if I could have the next size up. She informed me that there wasn't a next size up. I have to LOSE weight to fit into the biggest pair of pants the store makes. FML

by ardenm / 02/12/2009 at 12:45am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my mom asked me if I had an eating problem because I've been eating less. I only started eating less because she told me I ate too much. FML

by hungry / 02/11/2009 at 7:06pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, when my husband got home from work, I was standing in the kitchen, wearing nothing but stilletos. He asked me to make him hot chocolate. FML

by sissica / 02/11/2009 at 6:52pm / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, my mom and I were looking at pictures from the beach. She goes, "That is a REALLY ugly picture of Michelle" (my cousin). The picture was of me. FML

by bm / 02/11/2009 at 2:57pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, a flight attendant asked me if I was airsick because I looked really pale. I told her that was my normal complexion but thanked her for her concern. She insisted "No, that can't be normal." FML

by Casper / 02/11/2009 at 12:16am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

by thunder thighs / 02/10/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, someone in class was making a point about premarital intercourse - "90% of teen virgins aren't saving it for marriage, they just can't get any." Another classmate pointed me out specifically. FML

by herpderp / 02/10/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

by peacock_mina19 / 02/10/2009 at 7:08pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML

by JLoistheBomb / 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML

by maxthndr / 02/10/2009 at 12:36am / United States / Work

Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear ending the person in front of me. FML

by prettyinpurple / 02/09/2009 at 11:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Transportation

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

by apricot / 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Intimacy

Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11 to her garage where we start to have sex. When she comes to climax she slips and hits her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down, we were both still naked and she was unconscious. FML

by douglisk1994 / 02/09/2009 at 7:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy