About shannypannies : Hey I'm Shannypannies! I'm 17 and I live in Oklahoma. I usually visit FML after a cruddy day to lighten my mood!
For anyone who is curious about my photo, that is in fact my puppy. Her name is Pooh-Bear
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Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8557) - you deserved it (66082)
On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States
Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14788) - you deserved it (57459)
On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I found out that I have testicular cancer for the second time in two years, and they may end up removing my last testicle. Knowing full well I was also born with an extra rib, the doctor at the consultation joked, "Hey, you'll be three quarters of the way to being a woman." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32816) - you deserved it (1632)
On 09/20/2011 at 7:54pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47871) - you deserved it (4812)
On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, at work, I found a used condom in the fax machine. I'm the electrical maintenance repair for the company. I have to untangle it from the belts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20229) - you deserved it (1160)
On 09/16/2011 at 12:20pm - work - by Help - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71628) - you deserved it (9143)
On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I had a creepy old guy with awful body odor in my salon. As I was washing his hair, he brought up how he wants to start a garden, and how a woman's monthly flow weirdly helps to make it grow. Then he asked me if I can save up my used tampons for him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30118) - you deserved it (1486)
On 09/11/2011 at 11:23pm - work - by fashionista1787 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I finally noticed that my wife only shaves her bush when she goes on "business trips." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47765) - you deserved it (4093)
On 08/09/2011 at 12:59am - intimacy - by ksmith - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend told me about this guy who makes balloon animals with his penis. My boyfriend has spent the last 4 hours trying to make his penis look like a pretzel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22833) - you deserved it (2933)
On 08/08/2011 at 10:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML
I agree, your life sucks (44832) - you deserved it (2506)
On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my wife and I almost got a divorce over a game of Yahtzee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21639) - you deserved it (13071)
On 08/07/2011 at 5:44pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28549) - you deserved it (8924)
On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17264) - you deserved it (4038)
On 08/06/2011 at 3:10pm - misc - by lostforwords (woman) - Ireland (Tipperary)
Today, I was peeing, and I sneezed. I looked down to see that my gum had flown out of my mouth and gotten caught in my pubes. On the upside I got a new look. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15858) - you deserved it (6506)
On 08/06/2011 at 1:15am - misc - by en3rg1zer21 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my boyfriend admitted that on his last visit, he snuck into the laundry and stole a lacy black thong he assumed was mine. It wasn't. It was my dad's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28556) - you deserved it (2476)
On 08/05/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Monday 20 May 2013
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