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shane_109

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shane_109
  • Town/Country : the greatest fucking country in the world! USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 491
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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shane_109's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML

#20668963
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55919) - you deserved it (5603)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32721) - you deserved it (2097)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I bought myself a pair of beautiful, hand-crafted earrings with lighthouses on them. My mother was quick to point out the lighthouses look like dicks. I don't think I can ever wear them again. FML

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19900) - you deserved it (2547)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States

Today, I got lost at Best Buy. Meanwhile, my mom freaked out, and they called out my name over the intercom. When I walked up to the desk and they saw I was 17, the employees burst out laughing. FML

#20098355
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19045) - you deserved it (3636)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anna - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I saw a text message on my husband's phone from a "Candice", asking him if he and his wife are still separated, followed by an invitation to spend the night. I never knew we were separated in the first place. FML

#19732983
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35725) - you deserved it (2073)

On 06/04/2012 at 2:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, while at my ex-girlfriend's wedding, I had to hear her explain how she met the love of her life. This happened in the four years we were dating. FML

#19730976
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25001) - you deserved it (5628)

On 06/04/2012 at 3:05am - love - by Stolemylady - Australia

Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML

#19730259
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25338) - you deserved it (2182)

On 06/04/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by whattheheck - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to break up with her. It was a hard decision and both of us became quite emotionally overwhelmed at the time. We began to hug as a final goodbye, then her mum burst in the room and yelled, "HE FINALLY PROPOSED!" FML

#19725965
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35151) - you deserved it (3261)

On 06/03/2012 at 10:21am - love - by Matt - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

#19719129
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32401) - you deserved it (2356)

On 06/02/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by ironyisabitch - United States (California)

Today, I went to the hospital for stomach pains, and was told that it sounds like I have an ovarian cyst. My mom went into a rage, screaming that I'd lied to her about being a virgin. Despite the doctor explaining that sexual activity has nothing to do with it, she refuses to believe him. FML

Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML

#19713901
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28457) - you deserved it (2150)

On 06/01/2012 at 3:02am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the world did not used to be black and white. It was just the pictures that were. She still doesn't believe me. She's eighteen. FML

#19276451
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21373) - you deserved it (1919)

On 03/14/2012 at 7:31am - misc - by CierraJordan - United States (Utah)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, my dad finally met my girlfriend. Unfortunately, he was driving the ambulance that she was in, due to severe alcohol poisoning and was on the way to the hospital to have her stomach pumped. FML

#19021363
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22122) - you deserved it (6535)

On 02/07/2012 at 8:40pm - health - by screwed - United States (Connecticut)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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