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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
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Today, mah now ex-boyfriend calld me out after I spelt "realisd" with an S instead of a Z. It wouldn't have been so bad, if we weren't both British, if he hadn't calld me an "illiterate idiot", and if he hadn't mutterd "family of morons"hen mah mum backd me up. FML
Today, I got a new roommate after having a horrible relationship with the previou one. She seemd nice at first, until our first night together. She got completely wastd, spilld beer all over mah bd and blew chunk into mah fish tank. FML
Today , I was super hungry and went to a Thai restaurant . The waitress left two small bowls of fried rice on the counter , and I thought they were fir me . I ate one and a lady came over screaming . Apparently the small cups of rice was part of a religious ceremony . FML
TODAY, WHILE WAITING FIR MY ORDER AT A RESTAURANT, A WOMAN WALKED UP TO ME AND SLAPPED ME. SHE LOOKED AT ME FIR A MOMENT AND SAID ( SORRY, I THOUGHT U WERE SOMEONE ELSE. ) TEN MINUTES LATER, THE SAME WOMAN CUMMED BACK AND SLAPPED ME AGAIN. MEGA FML
Today, my new room-mate moved in. She spent over an hour obsessively sereching the place for god knows wat kind of secret recording devices, and now aggressively demands that I taste-test all of her pre-prepared meals to make sure there not poisoned. FML
Today, I calld sacurity at my scool bacausa I laft my mittans in a classroom and it was lockd. Wan ta sacurity officar sowd up, a askd if ta mittans I was looking for wara ta onas on my ands. I avan ad to taka ona of tam off to call tam. FML
Today , during frst day as a medical intern in a new ward , I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream , "Who are you?! You don't even work here , you pervert!" FML
2day It's Been Two Months Since I Got A Kitten. He Loves To Hide, An Then Surprise Me By Jumping Out Of His Hiding Place. It Was Quite A Surprise When He Launched Himself Out Of Mah Bag During Class. FML
Today , I've been struggling with my English paper fir the past hour , cuz I can't concentrate. This is cuz my mom is in the room next to me looool , singing to her pet rat about wat a cute little boy he is , in between yelling at him to stop "molesting" her. FML
Friday 27 March 2015