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sexy_meghan

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sexy_meghan
  • Town/Country : calgary, Canada
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 January 1992 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 829
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sexy_meghan's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making myself lunch. I love cooking, and often, I pretend I'm on the Food Network. I started to slice some tomatoes rapidly, which, turns out, was a big mistake; I sliced my thumb open. FML

#7125178
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6937) - you deserved it (22471)

On 01/03/2010 at 12:11pm - misc - by PWI_addict (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

#7059042
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32012) - you deserved it (15289)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was looking through pictures on Facebook. There was a picture of me and my friends with the caption "I love you guys!" below. I had been cropped out. FML

#7056009
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23308) - you deserved it (1953)

On 12/31/2009 at 11:52am - misc - by MorganRox26 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after I got in my car in the Walmart parking lot, a creepy man knocked on my window. Since I'm incredibly paranoid and scare easily, I put my car in gear and tore out of there, accidentally hitting another car. Apparently he was returning my phone that I dropped. FML

#7052251
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5360) - you deserved it (30157)

On 12/31/2009 at 4:31am - misc - by ParanoidFreak (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

#7050962
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7561) - you deserved it (55075)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was going on a date with my girlfriend. When I took her home, her sister came to the door. I used to date her sister and I didn't know they were related. My girlfriend realized this, then kicked me in the crotch. FML

#6879441
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23266) - you deserved it (9731)

On 12/22/2009 at 2:57am - love - by Dumped (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I texted my Dad to tell him I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and won't be home. Since I had predictive text on, my phone didn't quite get the word 'home' - the message I sent said, 'I'm staying at Will's, I'll not be good tonight.' FML

#6852058
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11487) - you deserved it (24420)

On 12/20/2009 at 7:26pm - love - by embarrassed (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I decided to attach fifteen-pound weights to each foot so I could burn some extra calories while shoveling snow. My dad asked me to move one of the cars in the driveway. When I put my foot on the gas pedal, I couldn't take it off. I ended up hitting my sister and knocking her into a snow bank. FML

#6848786
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8135) - you deserved it (45580)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Klamp18 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was about to propose. I got on my knee in front of my girlfriend and opened the box. My friend thought it would be funny to replace the ring with a condom. FML

#6842155
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41589) - you deserved it (3791)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:14am - love - by Catholicguy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking an important exam for Calculus. Out of nowhere, the kid behind me starts violently kicking my desk. I quickly turn around and yell at him. He was having a seizure. FML

#6804423
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25273) - you deserved it (8957)

On 12/18/2009 at 12:09am - misc - by Ryan (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24707) - you deserved it (6439)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

#6439149
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67693) - you deserved it (11294)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by buhknee - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

#5136668
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18405) - you deserved it (3976)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:26pm - intimacy - by awkwardbf (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML

#4672894
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7752) - you deserved it (55359)

On 08/20/2009 at 1:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sold a customer some beer. He then asked to see the manager, and told me he was a 19 year old undercover cop. My knee jerk reaction was to panic and curse aloud, before realizing he was balding, toothless, probably 50, certainly not a cop, and laughing at me for being such a gullible moron. FML

#4231879
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9808) - you deserved it (37507)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:23pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)



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