About sehrgutmann : In college, FMLs keep me entertained when I'm overwhelmed with work haha.
sehrgutmann's FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
sehrgutmann's favorite FMLs
Today, I forgot my boyfriend was allergic to nuts and ate Nutella toast before he arrived. He had just brought me flowers for doing well in an exam and I kissed him. He had a reaction and I had to stab him in the leg. FML
by noway / 03/22/2015 at 12:03am / United States (California) / Health
Today, my best friend confessed to having feelings for me. I've been in love with her for a long time, so I was ecstatic. She doesn't see herself ever going out with me, though, because she's a couple of inches taller and can't imagine herself "towering" over her man. FML
by falling short / 03/20/2015 at 11:26am / India (Maharashtra) / Love
by heymacie / 02/19/2015 at 12:45am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. Not an hour later, I walked in on my sister giving him a handjob in her room. And what's worse, my first reaction was just to wonder why he'd bother cheating on me for just a handjob. FML
by Anonymous / 02/17/2015 at 2:17pm / United States / Intimacy
by TJFuentes / 02/11/2015 at 8:39am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, it's been about a week since my boyfriend started his new medication, which has essentially killed any sex drive he had. It has also been about two weeks since I stopped mine, making me hornier than ever. FML
by myself / 02/09/2015 at 8:32am / United States / Intimacy
by VCDUDE11FTW / 12/25/2014 at 4:13am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm / United States (California) / Health
by noshow / 12/11/2014 at 12:44am / United States (Texas) / Money
Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML
by ring-a-ding-ding / 12/06/2014 at 12:18am / United States (Nevada) / Work
by Anonymous / 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/16/2014 at 9:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML
by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
- Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the… Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of… Today, I’m a bus driver in Paris. A guy got on with a sheep. I told him that you can’t take the bus…