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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 April 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4257
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About scottyrocks123 : Usually bored

scottyrocks123's page activity

Visits<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 7:23am<b>Marcella1016</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 9:49am<b>Avi8r</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 5:46pm<b>nullroute</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:54pm<b>JayRod17</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 1:05pm<b>youngmessi252525</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:49pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 5:08pm<b>saifnaqvi11</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:38am<b>Crazion</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 5:33pm<b>pinkwho</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 4:07am<b>Micool</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 5:26pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 11:13pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 6:58pm<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 10:36pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 7:52pm<b>Kaylyn15</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 7:29pm<b>Andrewski12</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 10:29am<b>wvcheesehead</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 1:20pm

Fucked!<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 1:23pm<b>Crazion</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 11:33pm

scottyrocks123's FML badges

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scottyrocks123's favorite FMLs

Today, my father told me he hasn't brushed his teeth for 30 years: he just wipes them with paper towels. I don't know whether to be horribly disgusted, or horribly jealous that he has never gotten a cavity. FML

by Mewsmash / 01/01/2016 at 11:23am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob. It felt like she was skinning my dick alive with her teeth. I had to pretend to finish myself off in the bathroom and tell her it was because I didn't want her to have to swallow. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2015 at 10:21am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally edged over the speed limit and got pulled over. The officer asked me if I knew why he'd pulled me over. Before I could say something diplomatic, my dad said from the passenger seat: "Because you're a prick in fancy dress?" I got ticketed. FML

by buttfingers / 12/26/2015 at 12:37pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I opened my Christmas presents with my husband. One of the things he got me was a ball gag. "Yeah," he said with a grin, "That one's more for me but I didn't wanna buy myself headphones." Cue our son asking me what it was. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2015 at 6:47pm / Australia (South Australia) / Love

Today, I made a typo in a line of code, bringing the company website down. Our admin was already pissed about having to work over Christmas, and he started yelling at me and ended up punching my supervisor when he got between us. Pretty sure my screw up indirectly got the poor guy fired. FML

by Kat / 12/24/2015 at 4:51pm / Australia / Work

Today, while lighting a cigar, I set my beard on fire. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2015 at 6:26pm / Love

Today, someone lost a support beam on the highway. My car found it. FML

by TabbyCat87 / 04/09/2015 at 3:57pm / United States (Colorado) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my colleagues were excitedly talking about going for drinks after work. I heard one of them ask, Is Sam coming?' and shortly after leave without me. I'm Sam. FML

by Sam / 04/01/2015 at 7:37am / Netherlands (Groningen) / Work

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

by Anonymous / 03/26/2015 at 9:20am / United States (California) / Work

Today, it was my first day working as a pharmacist. I quickly discovered that customers not only think that it makes me qualified to offer free medical advice, but they also have no qualms about showing me their various lumps, bumps, and vaginal leakages. FML

by MyPoorEyes / 03/19/2015 at 9:19am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I decided to have cereal for breakfast. I poured the cereal in the bowl, added the milk and had a spoonful. Then I realized that my cereal was moving in the back of my mouth. FML

by Eddy / 03/13/2015 at 11:27pm / United States (Arkansas) / Animals

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

by actually just constipated.. and stupid / 03/04/2015 at 10:03am / Tunisia / Health

Today, after seven people at work approaching me and asking me if I was 'that lad from the paper', I picked one up to see what they were talking about. Turns out my doppelganger is a man who brutally murdered his older brother last year. FML

by definatelynotamurderer / 03/03/2015 at 9:01am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

by mszoe / 03/01/2015 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up because we got into a fight over what color that confusing black and blue and white and gold dress was. FML

by confused / 02/26/2015 at 10:07pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love