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scotty3563

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scotty3563

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 30 October 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 172
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About scotty3563 : I'm Scotty the fucking hottie xD I love reading about the daily unfortunate events that cause people to say "fuck my life." Isn't that the only thing needed on this site?

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scotty3563's favorite FMLs

Today, mah dog had an upset stomach and diarrhea. To avoid a mess on the carpet, I confined her to a gated area in the kitchen with sheets over the floor, so any mess could be cleaned up easily. Instead of going on the sheets, she sprayed shit all up the walls. big fat FML

#20933932
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44216) - you deserved it (6668)

On 10/25/2013 at 9:50pm - animals - by kiwibox - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today... as I was about to enter a public restroom... a man walked out and said... "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of mah life." It was the ladies restroom. FML

#20785565
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46657) - you deserved it (3114)

On 07/16/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad nieghborhood, cuz I ended up bieng chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" fat FML

#20673360
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44630) - you deserved it (5985)

On 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

2day At An Open Mic Comedy Club, Mah Jokes Went Down So Poorly That Someone Decided To Hurl A Chair At Me On-stage. FML

#20466782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27996) - you deserved it (14545)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Today, mah boyfriend discoverd that if he flicks mah clitoris just right, mah legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously.

#20423881
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42644) - you deserved it (5015)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today , tha highly intoxicatd singar of mah band dacidd it would ba a wondarful idaa to squat down and taka a shit on staga in tha middla of a gig!! FML

#20408486
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37178) - you deserved it (4281)

On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -

Today I sent in an assignment from batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem analyze it and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML

TODAY, MAH HUSBAND DISCOVERED POKING ME IN MAH BELLY BUTTON MAKES ME HAVE TO PEE, SOMETIME IT'S UNCONTROLLABLE AN HAPPEN IMMEDIATELY. HE THINK IT'S HILARIOU AN DECIDED IT'S HIS NEW FAVORITE GAME. FML

#20186585
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25910) - you deserved it (2594)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes . FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28907) - you deserved it (3115)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, trying to be kinkyhile giving mah boyfriend a blow job, Ihippd him with mah ponytail!! He was thrilld, until I accidentally head-buttd his dick!! He curld up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again!! FML

#20170605
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14286) - you deserved it (32883)

On 11/20/2012 at 3:43am - intimacy - by kinkicali (woman) - United States (Washington)

Taday my mom sold my Magic box at a garage sale because I "never use it." Locked inside it was my fake ID , a couple of hundred bucks , and a bag of weed. She can't remember who she sold it to. FML

#20170086
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15027) - you deserved it (31365)

On 11/19/2012 at 9:04pm - misc - by karmaquestionmark (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, ma mom cummed ome drunk and yelled at me 4 20 minutes 4 not feeding te cat. We don't ave a cat. FML

#20164653
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23779) - you deserved it (1564)

On 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today... I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into house. I've been searching house for two hours and still can't fine him. I'm afraid to go to sleep.

#20142294
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33203) - you deserved it (2350)

On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)

2day mah daughtar callad ma talling ma sha had har twin girls. Sha namad tham Juli and Anna. Har nama is Julianna. Har kids r going to fucking hata har. FML

#20141194
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33128) - you deserved it (3624)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today , mah cat playad daad just so I would laava him alona. FML

#20126149
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19975) - you deserved it (5548)

On 10/21/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States



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