schpanki

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schpanki

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1553
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About schpanki : I just realised I have had the text "Awesomesauce" as description for a looooong time. I wonder if anyone ever read it...

Oh well, I like stuff, dont like stuff, yadayada.

Dont know what to write here. Bye.

schpanki's page activity

Visits<b>jamjam276</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 6:36pm<b>possibilites67</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 3:05am<b>wotfukm8</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 1:17am<b>Bluepan</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 10:56am<b>Pikathedoge</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 1:16am<b>andres969</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 10:53pm<b>ihartmytdi</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 10:43am<b>Viriie</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 7:18pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:34pm<b>vetgirl23</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 3:20pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 2:41am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 1:53pm<b>projectem7</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 1:15am<b>Teresalove</b> - the 01/16/2012 at 8:43pm

Fucked!<b>andres969</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 4:53am

schpanki's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of schpanki's badges

schpanki's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying we're too different. His only example? He likes ham and I don't. FML

by PunkChik27 / 12/11/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because we watched a movie that Taylor Lautner was in, she claims they made special eye contact and they are destined to be together. FML

by hot_shot / 11/28/2011 at 8:33pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2011 at 6:46am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous

Today, a freshman set off the fire alarm in my dorm at 2 a.m. He tried to microwave Easy Mac without adding water. I had to stand outside for 45 minutes while the firemen moved the noodles to the sink and ran cold water over them. FML

by CRC / 11/23/2011 at 10:38am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother spent over $5,000 to fly in a Feng-Shui master, put him in a five-star hotel, and had him walk around our house with a compass, moving things to help improve the "energy flow." Now all I have in my room is an old mattress and lamp. He's coming back tomorrow. FML

by Agathus / 11/10/2011 at 9:35am / United Arab Emirates / Money

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

by possiblyoverweight / 11/08/2011 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, I got a boner at the dentist. FML

by Me / 10/27/2011 at 2:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2011 at 2:10am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. He didn't know how to take off my bra and insisted that he'd figure it out on his own. He gave up a couple seconds later and played video games instead. FML

by Unknown / 10/18/2011 at 12:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I told a guy at work about my boyfriend. His immediate response was to ask me if I was making him up. He's the third person to react this way. FML

by UglyApparently / 10/05/2011 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Work

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

by ironic driver / 09/04/2011 at 6:10pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband went in for surgery and handed me an important document. It wasn't a will or anything similar, but a list of items and gold he wanted passed on to guild members on World of Warcraft. FML

by WoWWidow / 09/02/2011 at 4:02am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML

by Gross... / 08/16/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, my new mailbox key finally arrived. Not at the front door as I requested, but in the mailbox. FML

by MailMaster / 07/22/2011 at 12:20am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous