Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

saymynamess

Search for a member

saymynamess

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 146
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

saymynamess's page activity

Visits<b>dothenoodledance</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 6:29pm<b>Mr_Alarm</b> - the 11/08/2011 at 7:27am<b>ClingyOtter</b> - the 11/08/2011 at 7:21am

saymynamess's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of saymynamess's badges

saymynamess's favorite FMLs

Today, we decided to go to an aquarium for a little family get-away. At the end was a shark viewing deck, and I leaned over the rails to get a better look. How did I find out that my glasses needed to be adjusted? They fell off and sunk right to the bottom of the shark-infested waters. FML

#21211826
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39811) - you deserved it (11712)

On 07/17/2014 at 11:57am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw a very attractive young woman struggling with some boxes. The seduction attempt resulted in me carrying 60lbs of items for 30mins. When we got to her apartment, she thanked me and introduced me to her boyfriend. FML

#20579784
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19773) - you deserved it (37288)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by JacktheRussian (man) - United States

Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML

#18305013
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32321) - you deserved it (3581)

On 11/21/2011 at 2:22am - love - by nightowl506 - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught my husband once again looking at half naked pictures of a friend of mine on Facebook. When I asked why he did it, he said "I was checking to see if they were still there." FML

#18296145
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27324) - you deserved it (4496)

On 11/20/2011 at 6:31am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, I brought my girlfriend over to her first dinner with my family. My gramps spent the entire dinner telling my girlfriend how the Illuminati are plotting to take over the world and use microchips to control everyone. So much for being taken seriously now. FML

#18284255
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22442) - you deserved it (2852)

On 11/18/2011 at 8:58pm - love - by Trey - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend went and bought Skyrim, Modern Warfare 3 and renewed his WoW subscription. Looks like I won't be getting laid for a month or two. FML

#18273262
599 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43144) - you deserved it (11343)

On 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized that in my relationship with my significant other, the roles are switched. We went out for a nice dinner, I paid, and when we got home he "had a headache" and asked for an aspirin so he could go to sleep. FML

#18272596
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24866) - you deserved it (6148)

On 11/17/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Damnit (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching wrestling videos on YouTube, when my little brother walked in. Later, my little brother told my parents that I was watching naked men on my computer. They won't stop thinking that I was watching gay porn. FML

#18226728
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29460) - you deserved it (6777)

On 11/12/2011 at 9:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38942) - you deserved it (7732)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML

#18202130
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45551) - you deserved it (6585)

On 11/09/2011 at 3:00pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my dad made me quit my online school classes and go back to public school, because apparently when I'm on the computer, it makes his video games lag. FML

#18201929
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34133) - you deserved it (5265)

On 11/09/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by exiledliscense - United States (Arkansas)

Today, was the last day of the prank war between me and my husband. I told him the last prank needed to be the best one. I took a shower and tried to think up my last prank. When I got out of the shower, my hair was green. FML

#18080621
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11803) - you deserved it (32873)

On 10/26/2011 at 1:56pm - misc - by mycedes - United States

Today, I made a half-hour bike ride to the movie store, only to realize I'd forgotten my money. I made the ride back home, grabbed my money, went back to the store, paid, then made a second ride home. I got home exhausted, and opened the case. They gave me the wrong movie. FML

#17986367
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30685) - you deserved it (5418)

On 10/15/2011 at 12:12am - misc - by CPD - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad cussed out an individual on the phone because he thought it was a telemarketer. He was my Indian girlfriend's father. FML

#15377212
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38511) - you deserved it (4407)

On 03/19/2011 at 1:37am - misc - by dollarstorepwnr (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend thought the garbage can in our kitchen smelled bad. Instead of cleaning it, he had it equipped with a Wunderbaum. Our entire house now smells like "New Car". FML

#14717591
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18159) - you deserved it (3354)

On 01/26/2011 at 5:38am - misc - by everfresh (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: