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satega's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
satega's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 06/20/2014 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML
by Anonymous / 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous
by satega / 12/10/2012 at 2:07pm / United States (Missouri) / Holidays
by satega / 11/17/2012 at 4:15am / United States (Missouri) / Work
by Anonymous / 11/13/2012 at 6:34am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
Today, I watched my neighbor shake cat food calling, "Come here Mollie" at his back door. I then saw my own cat run into his house. I now know why my cat is so fat and never replies to me calling her Bonnie. I guess I'm being cheated on. FML
by kitty / 11/11/2012 at 5:10am / Australia / Animals
Today, a woman on the train demanded I give up my seat for her, claiming it was for people with disabilities. Tired from a long day at work, and seeing she had nothing wrong with her, I asked what her disability was. Apparently, obesity is one. FML
by NotAnExcuse / 11/07/2012 at 12:58am / United States / Transportation
by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous
by CutestBoysEver / 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, I broke a nail at school. The edge kept getting caught on things, so I thought I could file it down by rubbing it on my jeans. Apparently it looked like I was doing something else, because I was called into the principal's office to discuss why "certain things" should be done in private. FML
by Anonymous / 10/29/2012 at 8:39pm / United States / Intimacy
by Nickki / 10/14/2012 at 10:57am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/25/2012 at 6:54am / United States (California) / Kids
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…
- Today, our air conditioner went out. Trying to stay cool, I used an ice pack from when I sprained… Today, I'm sick. This wouldn't be such a problem if I wasn't leaving for college in three days, and… Today, my loneliness hit an all time low when I actually considered "accidentally" texting a random…