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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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sarah__tehe__

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sarah__tehe__
  • Town/Country : NEW TO THE Z TO THE E TO THE LAND
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1723
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About sarah__tehe__ : Guys are dicks, girls are bitches. So either way, everyone's f***ed. This website is very appropriate......

sarah__tehe__'s last visitors

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sarah__tehe__'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sarah__tehe__'s favorite FMLs

Today, I was pulling out of my driveway, and was being aware of the flowers I had just planted. I moved my head to look out my window as not to hit them, not realizing my window was up. I then hit my head break my nose and drive over the flowers. FML

I agree, your life sucks (17038) - you deserved it (28898)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by samantha246 - United States (New York)

Today, I came home from working twelve hours straight. Feeling rather frisky, I attempted to seduce my wife upon arriving home. She said that sleep was better than sex and went directly to bed. It was only 6:30 PM. FML

#1838919 (128)

I agree, your life sucks (50878) - you deserved it (4794)

On 05/11/2009 at 8:08am - intimacy - by BlueBallMcGee (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while powerwashing my deck, a bee flew and landed on my leg. Thinking I'll just wash it away before it stings me, I aimed the powerwasher nozzle at the bee. A bee sting isn't nearly as painful as powerwashing your leg. FML

#1818559 (128)

I agree, your life sucks (8237) - you deserved it (57300)

On 05/10/2009 at 4:39pm - work - by jokada (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (268319) - you deserved it (32438)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

#1800346 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (49537) - you deserved it (4102)

On 05/10/2009 at 1:05am - kids - by sucksforme. (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML

#1766885 (147)

I agree, your life sucks (5632) - you deserved it (55700)

On 05/09/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by t-dawg (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking: "What can I get for you cuntie?" FML

#1751488 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (60652) - you deserved it (16265)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to superglue a couple quarters to the sidewalk downtown and watch people try to pick them up. Unfortunately, street patrol was watching me glue everything the whole time. I was fined with public vandalism and defacing US currency. FML

#1652768 (157)

I agree, your life sucks (10947) - you deserved it (66791)

On 05/05/2009 at 1:43am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190 (368)

I agree, your life sucks (111567) - you deserved it (26061)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball... right into her face again. FML

#1452410 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (52695) - you deserved it (21604)

On 04/29/2009 at 10:35am - misc - by hyper12332 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I realized the senior thesis I turned in last week uses the word "asses" instead of "assess" 17 times. FML

#1423979 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (16123) - you deserved it (43638)

On 04/28/2009 at 2:47pm - misc - by fuckspellcheck (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I colored my hair. It was supposed to turn out blonde, but it became more a mix of red and brown and blonde patches. When I tried coloring everything back, a green tint was added. My hair is at the moment red, brown, blonde and green. FML

#1392760 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (30249) - you deserved it (26134)

On 04/27/2009 at 2:39pm - misc - by Fmyhair (woman) - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, I was snuggling with my neighbors four week old kitten while babysitting their kids. I fell asleep, rolled over, and woke up next to a dead kitten. FML

#1353969 (313)

I agree, your life sucks (59314) - you deserved it (37749)

On 04/26/2009 at 12:45pm - misc - by Fykkhttdsetkkhvln - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML

#1346080 (160)

I agree, your life sucks (68893) - you deserved it (3768)

On 04/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by calliefml (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was doing a fitness test. Though clumsy, I managed to spin around a bat then dash across a balance beam, run through some tires, and walk across a log floating in water. Pleased with my performance, I walked to the bathroom, tripped on my shoelace, and busted my head on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks (37234) - you deserved it (3521)

On 04/25/2009 at 5:09am - misc - by Clumsy (man) - United States (Florida)